“Come on, pull yourself together”, “Shake yourself up a bit”, “It’s all in your head”, these are phrases that have never succeeded in helping anyone in their fight against anxiety or depression, yet people use it far too often.
They probably want to do the right thing, but it is not at all the right way to help someone who is suffering, on the contrary, it will probably only make the situation worse.
No one can control their anxiety, there is no on / off button and this feeling of helplessness in the face of this suffering only very often reinforces this person’s despair.
We have the impression that there is a pessimistic intruder in our head who affects every word that comes out of our mouth as well as every movement we make, and we feel completely helpless in front of him.
Someone who has never had to deal with this may not know that anxiety is like there is a little voice in the back of the head that you can’t even drive away if we try.
It is as if a surly stepmother follows you everywhere saying that you are not going to make it and that you are not good enough.
A voice that keeps telling you that you should give up before you embarrass yourself.
A voice that keeps telling you that everyone will end up abandoning you sooner or later, that everything will end in disaster.
It is this voice that is the main cause of this chaos in your head.
What people do not know is that anxiety dictates that it is completely useless to make an effort, since it is more than obvious that we are going to fail anyway.
She manages to convince us that we are good for nothing and that we are not going to succeed in accomplishing anything in life, and that this is why it is better not to try anything at all.
Anxiety whispers in our ears that we are not a person made to be loved and that no one can ever really have true feelings for us.
Anxiety is also about believing that our friends are only there out of pure pity towards us, that our boyfriend is only leading us by boat and using us, and that even the closest members of our family are fed up with us and want to getaway.
Anxiety convinces us that sooner or later everyone will eventually cut ties with us and easily replace us with someone else.
She tries to convince us that the people around us get tired of us and that they are already on the verge of moving away from us.
And the anxiety doesn’t stop there.
“Do you see these kids playing in front? I bet they’re making fun of you. ”
“And you know, this awesome guy you just met? Well, it’s too good to be true and it’s only a matter of time before it goes away and leaves you heartbroken. ”
“What about this job you applied for? Well, you couldn’t have it or in a million years. After all, there are much better candidates than you. “
“And by the way, there are girls much prettier, much smarter, and much more interesting than you.”
And this list goes on and on.
I’m not here to tell you to magically quench that voice in your head.
After all, I know it’s impossible right now and that you would be the happiest person in the world if only it were possible, but it isn’t so.
However, I beg you to stop believing what she is telling you. If necessary, listen to what she has to say, then leave her behind.
Remember this: Anxiety is your enemy and it will do everything possible to destroy you mentally and kill you spiritually.
That said, it’s your job not to let it go.
The question that arises is: why keep listening to someone who is like that?
If it were a real person in the flesh, would you be willing to really follow his advice and take his opinion into account?
Would you let such a nasty person take the best of you and control you completely?
Remember that you are the only master of your life and your mind, you are the only person in control.
You are far beyond your insecurities, your doubts, and your excessive thinking because it is they who are part of you – and not vice versa.
Your voice should be much louder than anything your anxiety is trying to make you believe.
Your optimism should be greater than his pessimism. Your inner light has everything you need to successfully overcome its darkness.
And basically, underneath all your damaged parts, you know very well that you are sufficient.
You know very well that your anxiety is only deceiving you and that none of its statements is true.
Basically, you know your worth.
You know that there are a lot of people who care about you and who love you, and above all, you know that deep down you love yourself.
