Love at first sight, electrocution of love, love shock, electroshock… call it what you want, but who has not dreamed of it?
You know, this little twist of fate… the one that makes you fall in love with each other at first sight… and above all, the most incredible, it’s mutual! We swim in the middle of an American romantic comedy We all dream of it even if we are aware that Prince Charming does not exist.
At the risk of sounding naive, I believe it. I believe that a gesture or a look can be the beginning of a great love story. I believe at that moment when you’re like, “ I know. It’s him. It took me a second to know that he and I will go a long way together ”.
The official definitions: “Sudden love against which one cannot fight” or “Phenomenon that a person can feel during a sudden encounter with an unknown person”. So if we can’t fight, we have to dive! Very hard It leaves us in a passionate love that is difficult to control and on which it is generally impossible to ignore.
Why do I believe it?
- First of all, because I’m a great romantic
By dint of hanging out on dating sites, selecting the color of hair, eyes, professional situation, social environment, and so on… I only dream of one thing: to fall in love with the one I don’t absolutely not expecting me. Around the corner, doing my shopping in “almost pajamas” on Sunday morning, around a professional meeting, in the elevator of a shopping center (even if I never go to shopping centers!) … in short…
I dream of a surprise! From an unexpected moment.
From an unlikely encounter.
I dream of madness. I dream of vibrations.
Is it too much to ask? No. And I have examples around me. Including one that particularly touches me. They met. Did not speak to each other. He lived as a couple. She was only thinking of finding a job. But in the second, they both knew they would end their lives together. Today, it’s been 45 years.
- Then because it’s scientifically proven
So I am a romantic but I am aware that love, at first sight, does not come (only) from the heart. I have been aware of this for 5 minutes certainly (after a little documentation!).
“It is actually linked to our brain which controls all our sensations and emotions, activated by the entire limbic nervous system, and this, in a totally involuntary way. The body then reacts by producing “happiness molecules”, namely dopamines, oxytocin, and endorphins. The feeling of love felt would, therefore, be created from scratch by our brains ”.
I admit that this explanation is the opposite of a fairy tale but you will have to get used to it!
The human body is an emotional barometer
much more reliable than you might think.
How do you know that you have just experienced love at first sight?
The feeling of well-being: You experience a deep sense of recklessness and bliss that gives you real well-being when you find yourself in the presence of your loved one.
The obsession with the other: You only think about it, you only talk about him and nothing is of interest to you.
Physiological signs: Palpitations, hot flashes, reddened cheeks, gurgling in the stomach, blissful smile.
The impression of “déjà vu”: he is characterized by this strange impression of already knowing the other. Very quickly, you felt very close to him and your story seemed to you to follow naturally.
Lack of fear: People who fall head over heels in love right away have no complications in their relationship, their relationship seeming almost too easy.
Why should we be wary of it?
The risk of love, at first sight, is that it dazzles. Hence the tendency to idealize the other, to project on him all the dreamed qualities: he then becomes the most beautiful, the nicest, the most intelligent. It is placed on a pedestal. We only see him, at the risk of forgetting him.
Love is blind! NEVER forget this.
Indeed, the excitement associated with the beginnings modifies the perception of the other and produces a totally idealized vision. “Bewitched”, we no longer respect the “normal” stages of knowing others and discovering intimacy. If complicity, humor, sensuality, and s**xuality are the key elements of our sudden impulse of passion, let’s not forget one thing: it is generally superficial. People who are struck by this magical sensation are so elated by the emotional state that they tend to be able to do certain things that they have never done before. A hasty marriage, an abandonment of family, work, and many other sacrifices, just to make love at first sight last. And yes, they think they fell head over heels in love with the perfect person. However,
So be careful with the return to earth which can be violent and very brutal!
How to make this love last? Stop idealizing the other!
Distinguish between reality and the fruits of your imagination. What are its real qualities? Without pointing out its flaws, be aware of the little flaws to improve.
Passionate love remains, for people who have known it, one of the most confusing but also the most beautiful experiences of their lives. And sometimes, it even happens that the love shock continues … the rest of their lives. A good reason to dig up our old fairy tales.
“A heart that beats wildly, an intense heat that bubbles up to our bowels, wonderful tingling that invades our heart, love, at first sight, is a magical sensation. It strikes when we least expect it and frees us from any objective judgment. Who would have believed that the heart could bring us to such a state? As we say the heart has its reasons which reason itself ignores. Love, at first sight, is so far inexplicable. You shouldn’t bear in mind that this only happens to others, you also deserve to live this magnificent experience if fate wills it ”
TO REMEMBER TO NOT TO PLAN
Love at first sight is an emotion that is only the starter of love. It is a powerful magnetism that can ignite love. But true love requires knowing the other deeply, choosing him as he is – faults included – and wanting to make him happy. True love only flourishes in GIFT.
If love gets off the ground, this is no proof that it will last over time. A couple has to talk.