Love yourself first … to know how to love!

Love is the most beautiful thing that could be given to humans! But before you can love others, learn to love yourself. Learn to unconditionally love yourself and others.

Remember that life is worth living. Always believe in yourself and always be confident and optimistic.

In Love, there are no beautiful beings and others less beautiful. There is only the beauty of Love, the beauty of the Heart, and radiance.

 

A few ways to relearn how to love yourself:

1- Learn to live alone.

When faced with great suffering, we often have the reflex to get dizzy (outings, dating sites, etc.). However, if it is less felt, the pain is not absent, and the wound will have difficulty in healing.

It is by truly facing solitude that we advance the most, and that we leave room for “clicks”. As Oscar Wilde said, “  I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person ”.

This is the essential condition for being well as a  couple, and for harmony not to be based on need, but on the pleasure of being together.

Once again: never get into a relationship to fill your loneliness!

If you can live on your own and no longer “need” someone, you will pay more attention to how you feel and what is good for you.

 

2- Free yourself from guilt.

Most of us understand what it means to love someone else. Feelings of intense desire, admiration, or emotional commitment to another person are quite familiar. We do a lot to heal the love we have for others. On the other hand, the fact of loving yourself seems narcissistic to us. Stop scruples!

Yes, loving yourself may seem like an alien concept to a lot of people. It is is a mixture of self-acceptance, assertiveness, self-awareness, kindness, and self-respect. Love for yourself is both conceptual i.e. the idea that you deserve to respect yourself and be gentle with yourself and an action i.e. you must treat yourself with compassion and comfort. More simply, self-love is the achievement of a positive outlook on oneself. It is vital.

 

3- Overcome the negative thoughts you have about yourself.

Many of you find it difficult to let go of negative thoughts about yourself. These negative thoughts usually come from outside people whose opinion matters and by whom you want to be loved and accepted.

Are you not perfect? So what? Who is asking you?

If you find yourself showing perfectionism or feeling negative things about yourself because you’re not perfect, follow three simple steps:

  • Stop following your current line of thinking;
  • Focus on the effort required to reach your goal;
  • Then put those efforts into action.

 

4- Throw away your negative filter.

Don’t get into the bad habit of focusing only on the bad things in your life. Too much focus on negative or more or less favorable events in your life can make these events overly important. If you find yourself complaining that only bad things happen to you, try to find evidence to the contrary, as there is little chance that all bad things will happen.

 

5- Never insult yourself.

If you tell yourself that you are a good-for-nothing after getting dumped (eg… at random!), You are being unfair to yourself on top of being beside the truth. Instead, make a helpful comment:  “He left me but I will use this failure to move forward.”

 

6- Make a list of your qualities and think about it every day.

This can be difficult for someone who regularly thinks negatively about themselves, but try to find positive things about yourself that you can add to your list once a week. At the end of each day, think about your list.

Remember that every part of it, even those that seem insignificant to you, is a reason that makes you worthy of being respected and loved.

 

7- Give yourself a little time.

Don’t feel guilty if you spend time thinking and reflecting about yourself and your life. It is important to give yourself time and permission to love yourself. You’re likely to find that by doing this, you get to spend more quality time with others.

 

8- Celebrate and reward yourself.

This is the fun part when you love yourself: you can reward yourself! If you’ve managed to accomplish something meaningful, celebrate with a new Maje outfit or treat yourself to a massage.

 

9- Repeat positive affirmations to yourself every day.

Find positive thoughts that help you feel better and repeat them daily. It might sound a bit weird and unnecessary, but this habit will help you flip up your positive thoughts and you will start to believe them, even if you didn’t at first.

Here is for example a good positive affirmation which helps you to love yourself: ”  I am a whole and deserving woman who respects, trusts and loves herself  “.

 

10- Do things that make you feel good.

Think about feeling good physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Do whatever it takes to make yourself feel good. You might want to do some exercises or meditation, or go for coffee on your own with your favorite magazine.

Find a routine that makes you feel good and stick to it.

 

When you spend time loving and rewarding yourself, you are more likely to see the benefits in many areas of your life. Notice if you have more energy or if you are able to be more present for others. You might start to feel that you have more responsibility for the choices you make and that you have more control over your life.

 

11- Understand and accept loving kindness.

Benevolent love increases your feeling of kindness to others. It implies love without expectation or condition. He encourages you to love without judging (whether it is you or others).

Judgments about yourself or others can often cause problems in relationships with others or with your own mind. By learning to love without judging, you learn to love selflessly.

 

There is no precise method for learning Love. 

The only thing we can say is that very often we are not aware of what Love is. We talk a lot about Love but we are not necessarily aware of what this represents.

The main thing is to love each other, to respect each other. It’s not narcissistic, it’s paying homage to who you are.

Learn to love the image you see of yourself – physical, intellectual, and spiritual.

Learn to see yourself from another perspective. The more you accept what you are, the more you will create and grow love within you, the more you will radiate its presence, and the more you will know how to love.

 

What is to love?

To love means to accept the other as he is;

Learn to see in others only what is most beautiful;

Learn to dwell on his beautiful smile;

Learn to hear only all the delicious words that he formulates for us or for others;

Also learn to respect him in his difference, to reassure him, to console him, to awaken love in him.

Love is learning every second. It “does not fall to us all at once from the sky.” It can be learned, it is cultivated, and when you manage to cultivate this immense Love, it gives itself.

Learn to love beyond the human, learn to love by forgiving the weaknesses of the other, his misunderstandings. Learn to love him by accepting his differences.

Love is about loving yourself and loving your fellow human beings.

That’s all ?

Yes that’s all.

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