We have to make many difficult choices in life.
The clothes that we will wear in the morning. If we are going to drink tea or coffee. Who to spend the rest of our life with and what to do if we’re going to do totally different things.
Obviously, there are preconceived answers to these questions.
I want to stress that I do not denigrate marriage, nor relationships. I love love. I love him too much. I lose my mind more often than I would like to admit. Love is wonderful, useful, and fulfilling, but it should never be a dead end between the person and the life you want.
High waist pants. The tea is better for health. Choose the person you want to be with, because love triumphs over everything. We have a specific set of rules to follow when tackling the tough questions in life. In fact, they all have predetermined results.
Love shouldn’t be the biggest compromise in your life.
Even though you have been told otherwise. You’ve watched movies, read novels, heard adages from relatives and friends who maybe have very successful relationships, love is a constant compromise. You can’t have it all. And maybe they are right. You can’t have it all. But you should be able to have what matters.
You should be able to be with someone you love and live a life that appeals to, stimulates, and inspires you. You should be able to have, at a minimum, a relationship that encourages growth and exploration on both sides.
What you get when you have a relationship that forces you to downsize is an imbalance of values.
You might have found someone you love. Even someone you want to spend your life with.
You can make your relationship work with someone who wants different things from you. It has been done countless times. If you want something stable and the other wants to travel the world endlessly, you can find a middle ground.
You can find a middle ground where the two of you are half happy. But is this the life that either of you really wants?
Is life what will make you happy?
Will you be happy that you compromised and put aside your desires for another person?
If the answer is yes, then you are ready to go. Some compromises are worth it. But if the answer is no, I encourage you to move on. Pursue the life you want to live.
Here’s the truth about who is the best fit for you: They want the same lifestyle as you.
Being with someone whose eyes shine when yours shine, whose heart pounding along with you, is a gift many of us never really experience.
Because we settle for the person we love rather than the person who could push us – to be a bigger, stronger version of yourself. We tell ourselves that love is enough. Let him conquer everything. But we forget that love shouldn’t take over our life, it’s up to us to do it. And we should do it deliberately, triumphantly, alongside someone who shares all of our joys and successes.
So how can we meet such a person?
It’s simple: let’s do more of what we love.
Let us indulge in the uncertainty, in the search, in the pursuit of what we want out of life without the certainty that we have someone next to us while we are doing it. Let us throw ourselves wholeheartedly into the things we love. Thus, we will attract people who like what we like.
We will attract those who value what we value and who value all that we are. We owe it to ourselves to live the longest life we can live, even if that means we have to be alone for a very long time.
Ultimately, love is wonderful, but we must not compromise your core values.
You don’t want to spend your life looking in the eyes of someone who expects to find all the answers you need inside. Wait for the person to look in the same direction as you.
When you find that person, that’s what will make all the difference in your world.