You were in a romantic relationship, long or short. Now it is well and truly over. Maybe it’s been a while since it’s over but you’re still wondering if your ex will come back. The question resurfaces chronically.
After a love affair with a person, after having shared a life as a couple or any other form of relational life, it is normal to feel the need to have access to the answer to the question: ”is it possible to recover my ex ? “. The key is to give yourself the space to explore.
The answer to the question of the possible return of your ex is not something predictable. The answer does not exist.
Each person is unique. Each relationship is even more unique. The right questions, it seems to me, are not about how to know if your ex will come back or if it is possible that they will return. No.
There are no ready-made answers as Alexandre Cormont knows so well. It is an illusion to think that we can predict the future.
The future, it is you who participate in its construction. And it is above all about your future, your future.
The only thing you can do when wondering if your ex, ex-husband, or ex-wife will come back, and when you wonder if your relationship will get a second chance, is think about three things.
The idea is to dig into your emotions, to face your feelings with sincerity, courage and honesty. Jump back while drawing a parallel to the present.
First of all, immerse yourself in your love story. Then explore your breakup.
And finally, ask yourself why the question ”how do I know if my ex will come back? ”Is present or even recurring.
Take time for yourself, to question yourself and to get to know yourself better and to identify the why and the how.
It is a process that takes time and takes a lot of energy. During this process, pamper yourself, take care of yourself, think about your well-being. Don’t overexert yourself. Step by step.
There is a good chance, by thinking quietly and thinking with a clear head, that you will find out some very interesting things about yourself, details about your ex, your old relationship, the causes of the breakup, how you feel. about all of these events, possibly about your new relationship.
The road to reconstruction can be long and arduous, but it is a necessary step to move on and better live your human relations and especially your relationship with oneself.
Here are some avenues that are an attempt to move towards reflections on love, on the love we receive, on the love we give and the way we do things and why we live the love of such and such a way.
Your love story: sorting out to start a new life
The first step is to come back to your love affair. Rewind the events and relive your emotions and feelings.
How did you meet? In what context did you meet? At what age ? How did you feel when you saw him or her for the very first time?
What did you say to yourself when you saw him or her for the very first time? What impressions did you have?
How were the meetings spaced at the very beginning of the romantic relationship? Did that suit you? How was your relationship built?
Was it friendship at first? Was it purely a sexual relationship? Has your relationship changed from the very beginning?
Did you expect all of this? How did the game of seduction go? Who took the initiatives? How did the other respond to the initiatives of one?
Did things happen implicitly? Did they happen explicitly and with full consent?
Have you ever forced yourself into the relationship with the other person? What was the place of communication in seduction? And what was the place of verbal language?
Did you have any expectations regarding your romantic relationship? What was your role in the romantic relationship?
Were you having a good time? Did you have your bad times? At what frequency ?
What is your most vivid memory – whether positive or negative – during your romantic relationship? Could you identify several phases in your romantic relationship?
How vivid are your memories? How did you feel during these different phases in the relationship and how did you experience these different phases?
What did you like the most about your romantic relationship? What did you like the least? What did you hate? What made you feel comfortable? What made you uncomfortable?
How flexible were you? What were your limits? Could you express them to each other? How did you deal with your difficulties and frustrations?
This list of questions is obviously not exhaustive.
Ask yourself all the possible and unimaginable questions about how you felt through all stages of the relationship. It can be very painful sometimes.
It may happen that you discover particularly sensitive points. You may need help with this process and open up to its receipt.
Do not hesitate to ask for the help of your relatives, your friends, your loved ones, mutual friends – whom you can recontact – or even go to consult a psychologist to help you do this. order in all of this.
It is important to always think about events from your own perspective, asking the questions from your perspective and how you feel.
”How do I feel in this situation? “,” How do I experience this event…? “,” What did I do then? ”…
To really sort it out, don’t try to put yourself in the other’s shoes, think in the other’s shoes and imagine how the other experienced the situation. There is no question of starting to speculate on the other and to feed a paranoia.
Stay self-centered – for once it doesn’t hurt! – to better explore your experience in order to make peace with what you have experienced and with yourself.
After exploring your love affair, the ins and outs, it’s time to explore how your actual breakup unfolded.