That is the eternal question that all women ask ourselves!
Understanding men seem like an impossible mission and the worst thing is that there are no rules to understand their behavior.
There are some cultural characteristics that define the upbringing and education of boys during their childhood.
Based on them, you can have certain criteria to understand or at least try to understand the way they act.
It is important that you are clear that these are only very general characteristics.
It is not that all men act the same or that they have the same way of being, we do not try to generalize and recognize that there are individualities that do not always share these traits.
But if what you want is to try to understand the way your boy acts, to know what he wants from a relationship or how to interpret his actions, we leave you a short guide to those attitudes that can help you evaluate his attitudes.
1. It is difficult for them to identify and express their emotions
It is not that they are insensitive, just that they do not have skills so developed as to identify or process emotions.
Boys are brought up with the idea that crying or being sensitive makes them less masculine, which is why they tend to be more reserved than women in this regard.
That is why it is difficult for them to show empathy, cry or express their love freely before others.
They rarely talk about what happens to them and instead end up isolating themselves, looking for solutions on their own to their problems, without daring to ask for help.
Therefore, do not expect your partner and male friends to easily acknowledge that you feel bad or ask you how they can help you, they may not even notice that you are not okay if you do not express it directly.
Many are not able to intuit the feelings of others.
2. They focus on different aspects of a conversation
Again it is a question of nurturing and socialization.
Girls are friendlier, they are raised with the idea of expressing their feelings and being confident when sharing their emotions with their friends.
Men, for their part, receive an education that privileges their activities and interests over their feelings.
That’s why kids prefer to talk about sports, their favorite teams, or more exciting games. That is what is considered “masculine” and correct for them,
This is why their attention tends to wander when conversations in the relationship focus on feelings and problems.
They are not used to dealing with them or expressing them, because the point is to look for solutions alone, without asking for help or discussing it with anyone.
It is also common that when you tell them a problem, their initial reaction is to give you solutions rather than emotional support.
It is because they tend to be more practical and feel that they are more helpful when looking for solutions, even though sometimes you feel ignored because they did not listen to your feelings.
3. They are very competitive
Games for boys are different from those for girls, just look at their dolls and sports equipment to see that competition is a fundamental part of raising children.
Boys are competitive! And that extends from his work and income to the couple’s arguments. For them, it is very important to be able to earn, including wages.
If you want the relationship to have a future, they will need to find a way to deal with their competitive instincts.
Do not think that you have to belittle or hide your abilities to make him feel good, it is only about talking about it and giving it the value that the sense of healthy competition within the relationship deserves.
Remember that thanks to this, some manage to meet their goals, even settling in a new home in less time than expected.
Challenges have a very good effect on people and both of you can learn to bring out the best in each other.
4. They look out for commitment
If he suddenly disappears from his commitments, if he shows no interest in making the relationship more serious, don’t waste your time pushing him!
That competitiveness they feel with you, they also feel with other men around you.
Many times you will be surprised that a boy did not want to be serious with you, but just when you found someone you like better, there he did want to be with you
They are educated to have several girls and be a “Don Juan” who conquers many women wherever he goes.
Therefore, for men, commitment is a way to tie them up and force them to have a single relationship for the rest of their lives. It makes them feel suffocated.
The fear of compromise is really the fear of losing your freedom.
5. They can’t stand arguing
Men always look for the couple to evolve without problems or arguments.
They hate having to waste time-fighting with you, they don’t like having to watch what they say to avoid hurting you or always walking on tiptoe so as not to offend you.
For them, trust is essential.
If they feel confident enough, they are more likely to open up, tell you about their problems, and not feel as much pressure on themselves when they argue.
If you feel like you don’t have to take care of everything you say, you will be more comfortable and happy in your relationship.
6. They aspire to be able to show their essence
The truth is that internally men want to be able to lower their guard and get a life partner who understands them and with whom they can be who they are, express themselves without fear of rejection, and have enough confidence to grow together.
Normally we all show a public face and a private one, which only our relatives know.
If he thinks that when he gets home he will also have to hide who he really is to keep your expectations high, he will not be happy. Also, sooner or later his essence will be noticed because you cannot pretend to be someone else forever.
If you love him, you must accept him for what he is, even if that version of his is not perfect!
7. They have a hard time doing more than one task at the same time
You’ve probably heard that men can’t walk and eat gum at the same time, because unlike women they have trouble multitasking. And it is true.
If your partner is concentrating on some activity, watches television or is with his friends, do not try to talk to him about important things or you will have a bad time!
It is not that he does not care about you or that he does not pay attention to you, many times it is that he simply does not have the ability to do both at the same time and that is why he neglects some of them. So you have to fill yourself with patience and help him to be more efficient, do not judge him.
8. They perceive the whole, not the details
Women in a quick glance can capture infinite details that go unnoticed before the male gaze.
The same happens with conversations, women can memorize the context of the situation while boys most likely will remember only the punctual.
That is why it is said that we are not hysterical but historical because even as time passes we will continue to commemorate in detail each thing, especially the bad ones, that have happened to us.
If you want him to understand you: Get to the point! The more detours you take, the less he will remember how important your message is.
9. They will never know what you need if you don’t tell them.
It is your responsibility to express what you want to get out of the relationship. Boys, due to their upbringing, as we mentioned at the beginning of this writing, do not have an education that teaches them to express and manage their emotions.
That is why many times they do not notice alone when you feel bad or need help. If you don’t ask for their support clearly, they will never know that you need help.
You will avoid a lot of inconveniences if you ask your boy to be more attentive to you or to take on some household responsibilities.
10. They need the values
If he does something for you, don’t forget to thank him and applaud him! Recognition of their actions and support for you is very important for men.
11. They appreciate the receptivity you provide.
Let him surprise you! If they want to meet you at work, take you out to eat, give you a massage, or offer to help you finish your activities in less time, show them receptivity.
Let him help you, treat you like a lady, invite you to formal dating sites, and pay for the likes.
Another of the constants in the education of men as they grow up is the protective instinct and their duty to be the provider in a couple.
For them, it is important to support you, that you allow them to do so and show your appreciation for their gestures.
Helping a girl or pampering your partner is a way to feel more masculine, appreciated, and capable of helping others. That feeling is important to them.
12. They get frustrated easily
Just as our receptivity is important for them when they make gestures for us, it is just as important that we do not recognize their effort and gestures to help us.
They strive for the happiness of their partners, to feel that they protect them.
If we don’t collaborate and don’t make them feel important and supportive, it will be very easy for them to get frustrated.
As they feel that it is their duty to support and protect women when they cannot do so they feel incapable, fewer men, and frustrated with themselves.
They also get frustrated with the woman when she is the one who rejects him despite their efforts.
13. They want them to be sure of themselves
There is nothing more attractive to a man than a woman who is confident in herself and projects high self-esteem.
It is very primitive to be attracted to what you cannot have.
When a woman has a lot of confidence in herself and is sure of her worth, it is more difficult to conquer her and she becomes a more valuable kind of target for men.
As she does not need anyone to be happy, and as she is so attractive she has surely attracted the attention of others, men feel that it is a challenge to have that girl by their side and compete with others to achieve it.
It is the most basic instinct of a man: to want what is difficult to achieve.
14. They need visual motivation
Sight is the finest sense of men. They respond better to the stimuli they perceive with their eyes than to what their other senses pick up.
That is why for them the image of the girls is so important. They are usually attracted to a good figure, curves, and a face that they consider beautiful.
It is not that they are superficial, but that they cannot prevent sight from being the sense that they have developed the most.
15. Friendship with guys is not his strong suit
The idea of having friends is something that they do not handle quite well. Well, by maintaining a constant relationship with a girl, and feeling comfortable, physical and emotional attractions can arise that they do not know how to handle so as not to fall into temptation.
Even if your friend already has a fiancé, or has not given any reason to promote the “charm”, the anxiety about the possibility of sleeping with her is present.
They simply have a hard time not trying to win over a girl who catches their attention or has earned their trust.
That does not mean that you cannot be friends or that all the men around you want to be with you as a couple, but that in most cases it is difficult for guys to avoid physical attraction to women, but they can understand when the relationship it does not lend itself to it.
16. Your job performance works differently
Despite having the same task, women, and men often take different paths to get results.
While women are experts asking questions and digging deep before taking action, they are theoretical; men prefer to put what they know into practice and learn empirically as they work, regardless of whether they may go wrong in the process.
Regarding work stress, the way in which each one assumes their concerns also differs. They withdraw and seek to deal with him alone, but they seek comfort and help from friends or acquaintances.
17. They brag about their conquests
He may not have even had as many adventures in his bed as others have pretended to believe, but it is normal for a man to yearn to prove that he is a true conqueror.
Men are usually more physical than women and also from their childhood they instill in them that it is important that they be conquerors, gallants, that they manage to attract many women and are desired by all.
The more partners they have, the more men they should feel. This is how they are taught.
That is why it should not be surprising that they show off their masculinity by flirting with all the ladies they meet, although that does not mean that they actually get to go to bed with them.
The more they show off, the more they feel they deserve and get more admiration from their peers. It is a competition of egos in which, as in all competitions, they always want to win.
18. It is a myth that they are unfaithful
This attitude of conquerors often makes it think that men are more unfaithful than women and that, invariably, everyone always has the intention of cheating on their partners. But this is false.
The truth is that anyone, male or female, can be unfaithful for many reasons.
From feeling lonely or little-understood to feelings of revenge against a partner who does not make them happy. There are many reasons to cheat and they are all motives for both partners.
What is certain is that men are instilled with the idea that having many women makes them more “macho” or that committing and being faithful means abandoning other girls and interesting experiences. That influences but does not imply that only for that reason they are unfaithful.
For example, a while ago a friend told me that he slept with several girls because he tried to forget his ex
In fact, many women say that it’s not really that men cheat more, but that women do it better and that’s why they don’t get caught up as much as they do.
The important thing is that you do not fall into generalizations and avoid accusing all men of being unfaithful. The truth is that it is everyone’s decision and you would be surprised to see how very trustworthy men can be when they fall in love and make the determination to respect their partner.