Although we are of exactly the same species, women and men are so different in certain respects that at times we seem like beings who come from completely different planets. You’ve probably heard that “men are from Mars and women are from Venus,” especially when it comes to loving relationships.
What are the main differences in what women and men think of a relationship?
The way we see love, the customs of a couple, and the way communication should be, distinguish the two genders. While women value feelings more, men do so with skills, for example.
Many times, confrontations arise from mistakes, knowing each other and admitting our differences is an essential step to be able to maintain stable loving relationships and with good communication, which is the basis of success for any couple.
Do you want to know how? In the article, we discuss the main differences between the two genders, so that you learn to understand your partner and handle yourself better in the next discussion they have.
1. Between feelings and abilities
Men need appreciation and praise for their abilities and actions, rather than their feelings. Women, for their part, tend to worry about having their feelings recognized.
That is a direct contradiction in the 2 ways of understanding yourself as a part of a relationship. While the boy is moved to be appreciated for what he does, for his ability to solve problems, prove courage, and physical strength; The girl gives greater weight to the communication of the couple and the expression of emotions.
It is common that when faced with a problem, the man tries to go directly to the solutions without asking for help, while the woman will want the two to work together to find the solution. In an argument, the boy is more likely to want to cut down on the talk while the girl is likely to want to chat at length about the issue.
2. Mind games vs. irrational squabbles
Dating a person can become a kind of battlefield in which the two participants use their strategies and mental games to conquer, but also to defeat the other. No one knows for sure who will win or lose. Since they know each other and it takes time to settle in, it is common for the couple to go from flirting to arguing in a matter of minutes.
As we mentioned previously when they face a problem, each of them will have a different reaction. The man will try to solve it individually, without asking for help, although this makes the process more difficult enough. The woman, for her part, will try to dialogue about the confrontation and find solutions together.
If communication between the two does not occur, the woman will most likely take it negatively, as a schism in the relationship that can lead to arguments and inconveniences. If the boy does not express himself, he will intuit that something serious is happening, and it is in those moments when doubts, jealousy, insecurities, and arguments without any meaning with the other come into play.
In other words, they may accept that the problem is considerably more serious than they imagine, or that their partner simply does not trust them enough to seek support.
Assumptions are horrible for a relationship! If the two manage to communicate affirmatively, they will be able to avoid superfluous squabbles.
3. They communicate in different ways
It is as if it were 2 different languages! Men are specific and textual, but women are more poetic, graphic, and expressive with their feelings.
In general, men tend to organize their ideas before expressing beliefs, they are more reflective, organized, and simple when communicating. They go straight to the point. Women, on the contrary, tend to express many ideas to explain just one, they appeal to anecdotes and especially to emotions when they speak.
4. I don’t need you! Or do I?
The idea of sharing our life with another person is really nice and has become a social ideal of life. However, the truth is that humans can survive alone, without requiring a loving relationship. In truth, the only thing we depend on a partner of the opposite gender for is reproduction.
It is normal then that men have an instinct to solve individually and women also greatly value their independence.
Ideally, the two members of a couple accept and respect their personalities, but learn to share as a couple. If you have a partner, it is essential to lower your guard and reach agreements that take into account the interests and resolutions of both. Communicating and negotiating is an essential part of nurturing a successful and healthy relationship.
5. Give and take
Continuing with the previous idea, the principle of a healthy relationship is precisely sharing and dividing things. Give and receive in the right measure.
When you are in a couple, sharing has to be the basis of everything. The good things, the inconveniences, the debts, and resolutions have to be taken into account by both and in this way seek solutions together. If something affects you physically, financially, or emotionally, your partner should be interested and deserves to be communicated with.
As the custom is that each one of them has his life and action, it is very normal that at the beginning it costs a lot to adjust to this act of sharing things, which leads to discussions.
Next time, before you sue each other, better focus on finding solutions as a team. It is more productive and valuable to the couple.
6. Independent men and women
To conform to the other, each part of the couple must adjust their behavior without compromising their values, ideals, personality, and identity in the process.
While most men feel free and confident when they solve their problems on their own, women tend to wait for their partners to assist them without being asked.
Remember this difference the next time your partner finds himself in a situation where he needs help. Put yourself in their shoes and take their feelings into account when deciding how to act, don’t expect them to want the same thing that you would request if you were in exactly the same situation.
7. Apparent male insensitivity
Boys disappear when they feel that their independence may be compromised in some way. This also applies to its ability to solve its own problems on its own. It is for this reason that they tend to have more trouble getting intimidated and compromises in stable relationships.
With men you have to advance little by little, to be able to produce enough trust to share as a couple, but making them feel that they continue to be autonomous and free in the relationship.
In the moment of an argument, it may happen that the man decides to separate from the situation when he feels that his emotions take control, and then returns when he has controlled them. That makes them look disinterested and also, even, indifferent to the feelings of their partner. Not each and every woman understands this.
Some choose to lose hope in the relationship, not knowing how to handle the character of their partners and not understanding their perspective.
8. Feminine sensitive drowning
In contrast to men’s “avoidance” capacity, women can be just as much or more problematic when they cannot be understood by their partners.
From there they derive toxic and negative attitudes, such as partner harassment, recrimination of every mistake they commit, and also attempts to monitor their lives and resolutions. This increases the pressure on the relationship and on herself, due to the fact that these actions can cause depression, overwhelm, inconvenience to sleep, among many other serious psychological consequences.
Support between couples is essential. If there is communication, the two of you will be able to better understand your role in the relationship and you will be able to work on strengthening each other’s trust. It is not that happiness depends on the other person, but rather that together they manage to share enough to have a stable relationship that contributes positively to their lives.
The best way to start is to be aware of the couple, see how they behave, and ask them when they see changes in their way of being. The communication is the key.
9. Love is converted and each one of them lives it differently
Love changes over time! As people mature, we learn and we grow old.
What may be essential in youth loses meaning in adulthood. Even in a matter of months, a relationship can take a radical turn. Personal failures, insecurities, selfishness, inability to communicate, destroy a relationship regardless of whether it started on a positive note.
It is given these questions that the two must decide if they end the commitment or if they solve their failures. It is thought that men have greater commitment problems and that they are generally the ones who move forward faster after a breakup than women, but that depends on each couple and their history.
Mature love is supportive, overcomes the delirium of the first months, and goes beyond the physical attraction between the two. It’s about authentic love, trust, and communication. That is the foundation for a lasting relationship.
In conclusion
Regardless of how a relationship begins between 2 people, arguments are unavoidable in a couple. Not only because of the changes that coexistence implies but rather because of those differences that men and women have naturally.
As we pointed out, the best way to endure these situations is with good communication. Know yourself well as a person, take the time to get to know your partner, and understand the two of you who have different ways of seeing life and reacting to relationship situations. Together, you will find better ways to move forward than individually and self-centered.