There seems to be a problem or a question that just keeps popping up a lot… women who feel ignored and just don’t know what to do about it.
First of all, the essential thing is that we find out if this is or not a game. Let me explain: if you are being purposely ignored as part of a concrete strategy to gain your attention.
I can honestly and confidently tell you, believe it or not, that most men don’t “play games” with you. Really, it’s quite difficult for them to act so cunning and with a bigger scene in mind.
They don’t think so far ahead. Many do not even know how to set clear goals with a woman. And, fortunately, there are very few men who do go through life making very concrete plans to obtain the favors of a girl.
These few examples do so because they have a very particular addiction to the challenge and more than the issue of conquest, they are excited by the issue of control and anticipation.
And most men, on the other hand, want one thing (we know what), and they want it as soon as possible. Hence, they do not “play games.”
I don’t mean to say it never happens. In truth, sometimes it does happen, but it is not the rule. Most men don’t put as much time and energy into an end if they think they can achieve it some other way, and “playing games” involves a lot of work.
You have to meditate all the time as if it were a game of chess, and that is exhausting.
Now with the cards on the table, we are going to save ourselves all that allegation of mind games. If you are looking for the authentic list of each and every reason why a man may be ignoring you, then you have come to the right place.
Most men ignore women for two reasons that are based on their relationship with them:
1.- You two are in a relationship and communication has been lost
He’s sick of listening to you, and besides this, he doesn’t feel like you’re listening in the least. Nor do you feel that you have only to say. Still, you may feel like saying anything will only lead to more superfluous squabbles.
He chooses to ignore you or to remain silent despite the frustration or the damage that belligerent passive play can cause because it is the way in which he has always dealt with things or does not know what else to do.
There is no answer or easy solution for this, since the responsibility of communicating properly falls on both of them, and it is necessary for both of them to admit that if their relationship can still be saved, that will require real work on the part of both of them.
If there was a way to solve this problem that could be summarized in a simple sentence or even in a paragraph, I would. But there is not. Although, if you feel that this is the reason why he is ignoring you, always and in all circumstances you can tell him up front that: either they are seeking help, or you are not ready to follow.
Either way, if you’re not going to collaborate, why exactly do you want a relationship like this?
2.- They are not in a relationship, they only go out casually
First of all, it would be good for you to find out if you consider that they are in a relationship and for him they only go out casually. Well, on many occasions the whole mess can reside in this misunderstanding.
This case is somewhat more difficult. But I can say that it is not so much because they are ignoring you, as because they are simply living their life. He is probably seeing other people, and you are contacting him more than he is interested in answering.
Maybe they feel a bit overloaded or pressured and consider that if they answer you each time, you will start to meditate that they have a more serious relationship. And let’s face it, he may be right.
This leaves us with 2 sub reasons:
A) He is ignoring you due to the fact that you contact him considerably more often than he would like. You may not be giving them a good reason to answer. He is not motivated to reply by the fact that you are either oversaturating him with messages, or he is getting multiples a day from multiple different women.
B) He is not interested , ready, or willing to enter into a deep and meaningful relationship with you now and feels that answering you too often is going to make you think yes.
In this case, he already gives you all the time and attention that he is willing to give you. It’s not that he doesn’t have a good time with you, he’s just not looking to go there anymore.
Both A and B tend to be true when a woman shows herself to be too needy, acts too burdened to be in a relationship, is too egotistical, and sees the planet spinning around her.
Or he probably has a way of life that is too intense and tragic. Which causes me to avoid most of the contacts.
To deal with this drawback, we must first find out whether we are dealing with option A or option B.
If it is A, then we need to take a closer look at how, when and how many times you are communicating with him. This could be a cyclical pattern.
When you meet a boy, perhaps you enter into an active behavior in which you give him too much relevance and push too much. And believe me, that is not going to leave you.
During the process or immediately after meeting a boy, sending him messages or contacting him as little as possible is best. Probably if you do this certain guys will not respond to you either, but those guys, anyway, are not the ones you are looking for.
These guys tend to get into the perfect “relationship” mode very soon, aside from taking the female role from the active one and leaving you with all the heavy lifting of the male role.
Men need to learn to miss their girl and to meditate on her either what she does or who she does it with all day.
They need to be put on hold and want to know and get more. Our interactions need to be short and powerful to keep them interested.
Furthermore, they need a certain feeling that they are not achieving all that they could achieve. I am not saying that you immediately make them meditate that they are going to get everything and leave them with nothing, but you have to play with this a bit.
If at the beginning you give them a bit, even more so their expectation is always and at all times a bit higher than what they finally get, you produce incessant interest.
This active does not necessarily have to be of a physical nature, but the truth is that it helps a lot. Use that to your advantage to send eventual signals that tip the balance on your side.
Now that, if it is about B, then you need to find a way to objectively look at your life, how you live it, how much you love yourself, who you think you are and who you want to be. B atufa.
Regardless of whether you are the one who ignores or the one who is ignored. Because there is essentially no way for you to get what you need out of that relationship.
What I mean is that it really is not worth doing all that work. It affects many areas of your life and has side effects, such as distancing yourself from really good chances of having the relationship you are looking for.
I don’t mean that your life revolves around dating and having relationships. Those things tend to work themselves out naturally, you just have to put yourself in the right circumstances to meet the right men.
For example, one of my patients tried to solve her sensitive problems by burying herself in the music she liked and her passion for golf. Since he did it to escape the inconvenience and not to solve it, he failed due to the fact that it only prevented him from knowing other people in depth.
But these 2 same things, when he used them in a moment of greater affection, did help him achieve success because he began to use those talents in a different way and to meet more men with similar tastes.
Read about twenty reasons a man may be suddenly ignoring you
3.- He does not feel good enough or capable enough to go out or be with you
Some men behave in a totally counterintuitive way and the women they like the most are the ones they ignore the most. Not because they are “playing mind games”, if not because they genuinely do not want to be like the other boys who seem overwhelmed by them.
Another possible reason that men ignore the women they like is because they don’t feel capable or valuable enough to be with them.
Either they sabotage themselves or they avoid them altogether to avoid the pain of possible rejection. They reject themselves in advance to avoid a bad moment.
Even if you do manage to start talking to a man in this way, he will always hold a little distance or not respond for the exact same reason in all circumstances.
Maybe at times you feel brave enough and at other times you feel bad they just won’t respond. This can be really confusing and very simple to misrepresent.
But always and in all circumstances there is the possibility that it is not something that must do with you, if not for the fact that he does not consider that you really want to be with him and he does not want to make false hopes.
So you know, always and at all times there is the possibility that he “ignores you” for reasons that have nothing to do with you, if not with his deep lack of self-esteem. Unfortunately this kind of kid is everywhere. Finding yourself in this way is not as strange as you might think.
It could even be a person who you think something completely different about and are persuaded that they probably have a lot of luck with women.
The fact is, deep down in this boy, he is continually sabotaging himself because he can never accept, cannot or does not want to raise his self-esteem enough to overcome each and every one of these insecurities.
And instead build a barrier of silence that makes you feel ignored. And incidentally more attracted.
Dealing with this problem and finding a solution for it is not easy. You can’t do or force someone to change the things they don’t like about themselves.
My suggestions would be, first, not to treat him like a little one. You don’t want to end up pampering him or acting like his mother just because he doesn’t want to pursue what he wants.
This is only going to make him believe that even though he ignores you, you are there and it will never motivate him to change that attitude.
Second: don’t limit yourself to dating the exact same man. You can watch others while. It is proven that people who have had experience dating more people end up having happier lasting relationships.
Third, you must understand from your actions that your happiness does not depend on being able to approach or distance yourself. You must realize that your place on the planet is not only as valid as yours, but it is also not a determining factor in your life.
They should also feel that you respect them and that you will continue to do so unless they decide to do something unethical like “play games” due to the fact that men have a hard time starting relationships with women who don’t feel they look up to them.
But you have no reason to let its inconveniences affect you negatively.
Never forget that this class of guys will hardly change spontaneously and will stop ignoring you and suddenly behave differently. It is the way it is and unless that changes it is not a great idea to waste sensitive energy.
My totally honest feeling about this kind of guy is that you can take the initiative, even sleep with him, but not just wait for the relationship or for him to start doing his part in order to move things forward.
Or clearly take him off your prospect list and find a more confident man right away. Your time will thank you.
Again, I would like to reiterate:
Most of the boys do not “play games”, especially when they involve ignoring what they desperately need in their lives: women.
Surely a couple of them, a very small number, do it on purpose because they believe that it is the best way for you to despair to the point of achieving what they want with the minimum of care.
But, most of the time, that a man ignores you or that you feel ignored by a man must do with:
1) A very serious break in the couple’s communication
2) That they are in 2 absolutely different sensitive places and while you want a more serious relationship, you just want to hang out.
3) He is sabotaging himself by the fact that he doesn’t feel good enough to go out with you.
And you well know how you should deal with each of them in these scenarios. Do not get carried away by the first impulses and think things with a cool head.