Have you just met and are now together?
Sometimes you meet someone, hang out, get along, become friends, and after considerable time, get close enough to call it a relationship. But another way is that you meet someone new and in a week or two, they meet so perfectly that they skip all the steps and just plunge into them. If you think it is the latter, this article is for you.
Does this mean there is a problem with being too close too fast? No way. There was a reason for this to happen, maybe you two were in sync with the excitement and energy that moving too slow would have been boring. There is no way you can define or put limitations on love. It is what it is, and totally different for everyone.
For example, some couples take decades to finally marry each other and are still not happy, but some take a leap of faith and get together instantly and yet remain happy. You can never predict what is fast and what is slow, but if you find yourself pondering the speed of the relationship, here is a guide to help you.
Should I be concerned if he progresses too fast to be more than friends?
Love itself is quite scary and amazing at the same time. The initial stages are so overwhelming, your heart is always out of control when you see that person, they are all butterflies and rainbows. BUT, if things go way ahead of time, it gets scarier. Even if you and your loved one fully agree that things are moving forward, there are still a few reasons why slowing down might be helpful.
Signs that it’s fast
Here are some guidelines to tell you if he is too eager to be more than friends:
The “I love you”
You’re never supposed to rush into saying those three precious words unless you’re absolutely sure. If he says that too quickly, within a few days of seeing you, it is a sign. You may also feel like you’re not connected enough or that he doesn’t know you well enough to be in love with you.
Your friends know everything
Guys usually take a long time to introduce you to their friends or even talk to them about the girl they like. This is a very good sign that he likes you so much that he would like you to be a part of his life, but it is also a sign that you are moving too fast if you barely talked with his friends or didn’t spend as much time with him alone even.
Tell his parents
Talking to parents and wanting you to meet them is a BIG step. This cannot be taken lightly and definitely not at the beginning of the relationship. How do you know it’s too early? You are too nervous and confused about this, whereas if they had spent a considerable amount of time together, that would not be the case.
Talk about marriage and children
Coming from a boy, usually, girls would be delighted to hear engagement conversations. But just meeting someone and talking about it gives you the feeling that you have a lot to deal with. These matters are very important and you will have plenty of time to address them.
14 ways to protect yourself (physically and emotionally)
Whatever happens, you and your happiness come first. Never get lost following someone’s path. Slowing down a bit won’t hurt your relationship, it will just make it clearer. Here are some tips to protect yourself both physically and mentally:
Every little milestone in a relationship, whether it’s your first kiss or cooking together, has its importance. If you do it all in one day, where is the charm of that? Each step teaches you something, and if you miss it, you may never understand your partner at all.
2. Dress how you like
Men often like to command the way you live and the way you dress. If you agree to use what you like, no problem. But if it makes you uncomfortable and he doesn’t understand it, it means he doesn’t know you very much.
3. Constant texting can be bad
Have you ever felt like you’re always tired of looking at that screen, that you forget where you are or what you were supposed to do? People around you start to get angry and you miss many things like work, studies, your daily activities, etc.
4. It’s okay to say no
Even if you are swooning over him, it is not healthy to accept all of his demands and decisions. Take a stand for yourself and you will never lose your dignity. When you say no, you are actually being honest with yourself first, you have the right to take advantage of it.
5. Have some time for yourself
This is a known fact that people need to spend more time with themselves, doing things that reassure them. It can be a short trip, a full spa day, a day with your friends, etc. The main purpose is to relax, so it will be useless if you keep thinking about relationships. This will give you time to relax and enjoy yourself.
6. Proper body language
Your body language and your little reactions to things can mean a lot. You keep laughing at every joke that doesn’t even seem funny to you, or you try really hard to be exactly how he wants it, even if it means not feeling comfortable in your own skin. This is not the opposite of protecting yourself and basically abandoning yourself.
7. Don’t trust too soon
Sure, a relationship is built on trust, but it’s okay to take the time to fully trust someone. A little bit of waiting will only keep you from hurting yourself. Make him earn your trust and earn him too.
8. Lower your expectations
This is the universally accepted rule, never wait too long. In all other relationships, expectations hurt like hell, but in love, they are even more painful.
9. Stay connected with your friends
Friends will suffer the most when they get into a relationship. Very few people realize in the early days that they are getting so involved that they miss out on their friends. So stay connected, even if something bad happens, you still have your support.
10. Give and receive space
Space does not mean physical distance, but rather giving us time to reflect. It is absolutely essential to let others do the things they like in their free time and not constantly spy on yourself or keep track of everything.
11. Take control of your relationships and yourself
If you are simply getting nervous and tired in a relationship and are too afraid of losing yourself in it, then talk to your partner. Discuss the progress with them and who knows the two of you could be on the same page. If not, then it’s okay to ask for what you want. If you can’t protect yourself, no one can.
12. Explore your options
There is a big world out there, confining yourself to one person or group will only disappoint you. Also, expand your imagination and your social circle, think positively about how someone could be exactly right for you, match your rhythm and understand you.
13. It’s okay to get advice
If you are too confused about something, it is absolutely okay to seek help and advice from family or friends. It’s better than having a quick and confusing relationship that leads nowhere.
Should I go on to this relationship romantically?
It all depends on you, if you feel like the chemistry is okay between the two of you then go for it. But dragging a relationship is very toxic. Romance is all about passion and the fire that drives you both. Too fast, too slow won’t matter if they are seen riding through the happy sunset at the end. You should only stop if something takes you out of your comfort zone, otherwise, everything is fine.
What’s the rush anyway? Something as special as love must be appreciated every step of the way, each moment must be enjoyed to the fullest before moving on to the next. So take a deep breath, look at everything in perspective, and then decide.