it seems that men do not listen to women and that this could have an explanation. One of the most difficult situations to deal with in an interpersonal relationship between men and women is that apparently, men do not pay attention to what women say.
If there is not a good ability to listen to the other, communication becomes complicated and creates problems. If this causes so much conflict, why don’t men listen to women? Apparently, there is a powerful reason behind this.
The Scientific Reason Why Men Don’t Listen To Women
In any interpersonal relationship, it is important to listen to the other. In friendship, couple, work, or family relationships, we know that communication must be two-way, that is, one speaks while the other listens, deciphers the message, and sends a response.
When one of these points is not met, communication is not effective and it leads to misunderstandings and frustrations of all kinds. That is why it would be important for this to stop happening, but it is very common today that men do not listen to women, why is this?
Possible Causes Why Men Don’t Listen To Women
This is one of the most complex issues in relationships. If on the one hand it is said that women speak a lot and on the other, they speak little. How are we going to communicate? If to fix our problems we have to talk and listen and they don’t, how are we going to solve all those conflicts?
This topic has been the cause of various studies. Many of them from psychological, neurological, and social perspectives. It seems to be one of the most complex situations and one that has taken the most time for scholars to try to arrive at a definitive answer. To try to clear up this dilemma, these studies have asked men what their reasons are for not listening to women .
1. Women talk a lot
It is well known that women speak more words than a man in a day. In various studies where men have been asked what is the reason they do not listen to women, a high percentage of them have answered that it is because they talk a lot and very fast so that after a few minutes they stop talking. pay attention.
2. They feel attacked
Men often feel like they are being scolded when a woman talks to them. Although this is not necessarily the case, the men stated that the tone of voice, the topics, and the way of speaking make it seem that what is being said is a scolding, so they feel attacked and one way to protect themselves is to stop listening.
3. The subject has already been discussed on other occasions
When asked why men do not listen to women, they have answered this. They state that when the topic is first discussed, they pay attention. However, when they return to the subject, they tend to lose their attention very easily, since they have the feeling that it no longer makes sense to continue the discussion.
Scientific theories on why men don’t listen to women
Despite these possible reasons, there are some scientific studies that try to explain this problem in greater depth. This is one of the most common problems in the proper process of interpersonal communication, so social scientists, psychologists, and neurologists have been concerned to investigate this phenomenon in depth.
There are basically two main theories that address this situation. It seems that this has finally shed light on why men do not listen to women, which could be reason enough for women to be less frustrated with this situation and that this leads to fewer problems in their relationships.
1. The timbre of the woman’s voice
The most popular study on the subject talks about the timbre of a woman’s voice. The University of Sheffield in the United Kingdom did research on this and explains that human beings decode the sound emitted in different ways depending on gender. Men’s brains decode women’s voices in the same way as music.
This means that the voice of women vibrates in a wave frequency very similar to those of music, being more complex to decode as it has more nuances. This involves a major work in the brain which, after several minutes, ends up exhausting it because it is not only decoding the message, but also the sound itself. This ends up making it difficult to understand the full message.
2. Less social skills
Another theory about why they don’t listen to women has to do with social aspects. Due to biological issues, men are predisposed to have lower language and communication skills. In general, they have less capacity for empathy and social skills.
This creates a reluctant and detached attitude when faced with discussions and talks with a woman. After a few minutes, your attention drifts because the brain’s capacities cannot hold enough attention for too long. Usually what they want at that point is to end the conversation.
What to do for a man to listen to a woman?
Once we have understood the possible causes, we can act. This must be a compromise on the part of both of you. The objective should be to improve communication between the two and that the talks lead to problem-solving. For this, effective communication and an effective approach to situations must be achieved.
On the one hand, women may have a better disposition to have not so long conversations, that is to say, concrete ones. Think and plan a little in advance what to say and do it in short, direct, and clear sentences. Find a time and place with few distractions and create an atmosphere of calm and relaxation
At the same time, men must have a greater willingness to listen. In the first place, the ability to be empathetic must be developed in order to understand that what is being said is important. Ask questions if something is not being clear, look her in the eyes, find a comfortable position, but not too relaxing, and eliminate distractions in general.
Another attitude to develop is to be open and honest. If at any point the conversation is veering off, you should calmly get back on track. Sometimes we will have to have the diplomacy to request a time to relax, get up, take a breath so that when we return we will have the initiative to take up the subject.
If the two of you are willing to do your part and change certain attitudes, you will surely get better communication. Although the causes of why men do not listen to women can have a biological and neurological origin, an open and willing attitude can go a long way towards alleviating this situation.