Relationships are usually somewhat complicated, especially when we go through a difficult situation. If you want to know how to help my partner if he suffers from depression or is sad, you have come to the right place. We will tell you everything you need to know about it. In addition, we will leave you some tips that you can put into practice to solve it.
By being in a relationship, our partner becomes our greatest support and vice versa. Carrying with this responsibility can be difficult, but as long as we feel comfortable with our partner and truly love them, it will not be very tedious. As long as we know how to do it so as not to overwhelm our partner , and to make him see reason.
In case you didn’t know, depression is a permanent state of mind in many people. Surely, you know or know of someone who is going through the same thing. It is normal that in these cases we ask ourselves what we can do about it to help the person we love.
Tips to help my partner deal with depression
In the same way that the state of depression must be diagnosed by a doctor, treatment must be offered by a mental health professional. However, we leave you some tips that you can put into practice if you want to help him overcome it.
Communicate and find out the reason why it is wrong
The first thing you need to do is communicate with your partner to understand why they are feeling bad. Yes, for some this will be obvious, although for others this can be an extremely complicated task.
Especially when people who are going through a state of depression refuse to speak clearly about what is making them sad. Sometimes your partner may not feel confident enough to tell you why they feel that way. The reasons can be several and they may feel guilt or shame.
That is why the second most important thing is that you constantly let him know that you will always be there no matter what happens.
A person with depression can never feel lonely or it will get worse. Make him see the good side of things, and avoid constantly blaming himself for everything bad that happens. If your relationship is deteriorating and there is emotional distance, speaking honestly about your emotions is difficult.
In these cases, it is important that you do not disappoint your partner at any time, and be as understanding as possible. Remember that depression is a mood disorder, which can have many consequences if neglected or overlooked. Therefore, you should not downplay the matter and understand that it is a disease.
Value the small improvements of your boyfriend or partner
Whether you have started treatment with a professional or not, if you want to help your partner who suffers from depression, it is best to focus on what he is doing and his progress. Appreciate the small advances and improvements you have.
If, for example, one day you get up earlier or fix it, it will be very helpful for your partner with depression if you make a positive comment.
Keep in mind that depression won’t go away overnight, so avoid creating false expectations about it. It is a gradual process in which our partner must understand for himself why he feels sad and face his situation.
Stay calm and don’t rush looking for quick or easy solutions or alternatives. Well, these will only get more frustration and you will not be able to help your partner who suffers from depression.
If he allows you, you can accompany your partner to therapy or be part of the support team. To do this, consult with the health professional with whom you are being treated to see what are the ways in which you can be of help.
It is not advisable to pressure or blame
It is also not good for you to pressure or blame him for his mood if you want to help your partner who suffers from depression. On the contrary, it is best to offer your ear so that he can talk to you as many times as necessary to vent.
In most cases, having a person by our side who supports us without judging or pressuring us is a strong pillar to overcome depression. That is why you should be a little more open and understanding with your partner so that he can feel more comfortable telling us what is happening to him.
When talking to your partner or giving him advice, be very careful, measure your words and avoid anything being aggressive or imposing things. While it is true that we want to help the person we love overcome their depression as soon as possible, pushing can backfire.
Avoid phrases like “keep calm” or “this has to happen to you.” On some occasions, they can sound like a demand and like a call to do nothing so that you can feel better, quite the opposite.
It is important to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and be a little more empathetic to their situation. Always keep in mind that some things that are easy for you to do, can be complicated for your partner.
Help your partner, but don’t overprotect her
There is a fine line between helping your partner and being overprotective. In the same way that children need a guide to grow, learn and improve, they need a space of non-overprotection.
Don’t let the desire and need to help your partner with depression end up flooding you or your relationship. You do not have depression and you should not feel guilty if your partner suffers from it. Keep enjoying your activities and stick to your daily routine.
Yes, you have to help your partner, but you should not neglect yourself or leave out all the things that make you happy. If you end up depressed too, you won’t be able to help your partner cope.
Let him have his space to make mistakes , make bad decisions or have stages of apparent “stagnation”. On the other hand, being overprotective will make your partner feel worthless or unable to do certain things alone. You need to participate in daily activities, even if it is difficult for you.
Seek help, if he can’t do it alone, support him to do it. Advanced depression is something that needs to be treated by a professional. And it is vital that it is treated as soon as possible so that unpleasant situations do not occur in the future.
Anticipate the events to avoid any conflict and relieve the emotional tension that your partner may feel . People with depression can be very volatile, so always be active in the event of an irregular or difficult situation.
In these moments, staying calm and having a good predisposition to love and understand them will be the best. Some family, academic or work situations can increase the stress on your partner, causing him to have more severe and intense episodes of depression. As their support, try to lighten this burden as much as you can.
When you want them to seek professional help, say it as advice and never as a demand or an imposition. You can tell him about the benefits and improvements he could have if he does it to help your partner who suffers from depression.
Factors that cause depression in your partner
There are hundreds of factors that can cause depression in your partner or in anyone, regardless of age. It is important that you know that not all people face the same situation in the same way.
The process and time to overcome problems is not the same in all cases. However, the most common factors that can cause depression are the following:
Financial problems are one of the most prevalent factors in people with depression. We all suffer from it at some point, and in case your partner suffers because of it, there are many ways to help him.
Lend him money, do not try to give it to him because you will only increase his slump. Tell him that he can count on you for anything, and that you will be there for him.
The loss of a loved one or a recurring problem with a family member can lead to depression. It also influences how you relate to others. Some women, for example, suffer from this disease after childbirth.
In this case most of the time we are with our hands tied, because there will not be much we can do. As long as we stay close to them supporting them , with a smile on our faces they will gradually improve. Take him out for a walk, to the movies or to a park. A place where you can be happy, and if you are surrounded by animals much better.
Social or work problems
Friends and work also give problems sometimes, in case he is sad about work or has lost it, find the necessary words of encouragement to let him know that his situation will improve soon, and if necessary help him find another job a lot better. Friends always have fights, but for that, a time between the two of you will easily make it better.
In some cases, the factors of depression or mental disorders can become genetic. In this way, they are more vulnerable or prone to suffering from this disease. If your partner has suffered traumatic episodes in the past or has had depression, it is very likely that he will suffer it again in the future.
Among the genetic factors we can mention his personality. If they are insecure, dependent, hypochondriacal, self-demanding or perfectionist, they can become depressed.
What are the symptoms of depression in a couple?
First of all, it is important that you know if your partner really has depression or is simply sad about a particular situation. It is very normal for us to confuse other problems, so only a mental health professional can tell us with certainty if this is the case or not.
However, you must keep in mind what are the characteristic symptoms of depression in order to act accordingly. Keep in mind that in some cases it may be more noticeable than in others, as it will depend on each person in particular.
The main symptoms that we can mention are:
- Sleep disorders: You have a hard time falling asleep and you can’t get enough sleep, even if you spend many hours in bed. The opposite scenario can also occur, that is, you spend more hours asleep than normal.
- Problems and physical ailments or illnesses without apparent cause, such as headache, stomach, back, etc.
- Gross changes in their moods and lack of patience. Out of nowhere he becomes irascible and explodes out of nowhere.
- You are sad or down most of the day for months or get frustrated easily over irrelevant things.
- He begins to neglect his social relationships, as a couple, children, work, etc.
- Your partner makes negative comments about himself, such as “worthless” or feels that he is “useless” in everything he needs to do.
- You lack energy to do anything.
- Eating Disorders: Either you don’t want to eat or you overeat.
- His self-esteem is low and he stops worrying about himself, he is not interested in his physical appearance.
- She focuses only on failures, either her own or those of the people around her.
- You have trouble concentrating on your daily activities and cannot make decisions.
- Loses interest in activities that you used to like and stops doing them.
If your partner has any of these symptoms, it is best to seek professional help. Therapy can be the solution to your depression.
What to do if my partner has depression and does not want to see me?
One of the most common symptoms of depression is isolation. You may be faced with the constant threat that your partner at one point does not want to see you and the other does, in this case you must also be understanding. Do not get angry or argue, but make him understand in the best possible way that it is not good that he is alone.
It will be useless if you call him because he will not answer, the best way is to attend his house without prior notice and let him know whether he wants to or not you will stay by his side. Bring food, movies, and lots of things for both of you to have fun . Because laughter is the best way to counteract a bad mood.
In case this does not work, you can contact a family member . Talk to his siblings, cousins or parents so that together they can find the help that your boyfriend needs. In union there is strength, and if your boyfriend knows that he is loved and loved by everyone around him, perhaps he can begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Finally, in those cases where the depression of your partner ends up turning into situations of abuse, it is important that you reconsider if he is the ideal person or not.
As we told you before, it is important that you do not get carried away by the state of depression that your partner has. This will end up deteriorating the emotional relationship of your relationship and will end up being something toxic for both of you.
So far we come with this super complete guide on how to help my partner if he suffers from depression or is sad. We hope that you can put into practice all the advice and possible solutions that we have given you.