Marriage proposals happen all the time.
Some are unexpected, while others are predictable.
More often, the question “Will you marry me?” is answered with a simple “yes” or “no”.
But it doesn’t have to be that way all the time!
In fact, there are infinite ways to respond.
You can try to be funny, witty or even sarcastic!
This list is a collection of over one hundred and fifty answers that you can use to answer the question, “Will you marry me?” Remember, you don’t need to refer to this list just for serious marriage proposals.
As a matter of fact, the best time to use this list is when someone tries to play a funny move on you or proposes jokingly to you.
Funny Responses to “Will You Marry Me?”
- Great, but let me see what the ring looks like first.
- Yes, as long as we can have our honeymoon tonight.
- But I only like 2D boys/girls. You’re 3D, so it’s a no!
- Sorry, I’m already engaged to Johnny Depp.
- Haha ha! This is good!
- Please get in line!
- I marry! Wait… I mean, yes!
- Answer these questions first: (1) How much money do you have and (2) how much time do you have?
- Forgive me, but I’m already married to Haruhi Suzumiya.
- But first, I will have to divorce my wife.
- What is getting married? Is it to eat?
- Let me check my schedule first.
- Send your application form to my secretary.
- Then sign this contract here.
- Great, who are we going to marry? I will marry you? How about you marry me?
- *laughs*
- Hmmmm… will they serve alcohol at this wedding you are talking about?
- Where’s my damn ring?
- Who are you and how did you get to my house?!
- If the diamond in the ring is big, why not?
- But first, I have to make sure your name is clear.
- Send your resume and cover letter to my email address.
- Let me get back to you after I authenticate this diamond ring.
- Well, that depends.
- Are you a billionaire? Are you a model or a celebrity? If not, no thanks!
- *Run* Run fast and don’t look back!
- Okay, now let’s seal the deal with a kiss.
- Thank you for choosing me. You will receive a response within 3-5 business days.
- Remember, I call you, so don’t call me.
- Sorry, the person you are trying to contact is unavailable. Try again later.
- You are the third person to ask me this week.
- You’ll have to take me out to dinner first.
- What do you have for me?
- Give me a million dollars, and I’ll consider it.
- You go first! After all, you’re the one who asked.
What to Say Instead of “Yes” or “No”
- No thanks, I’m gay.
- What do you mean by ‘marry’?
- It better not be expensive!
- I do not know you.
- Yes, yes, now be quiet.
- My favorite series has started.
- How did you get here?
- I can not.
- Don’t make it harder than it should be.
- Oh sure.
- Sorry, but I think of you more as a friend.
- Umm, why?
- Stop playing.
- I dreamed, but I never dared to hope.
- Only if you sign a pre-agreement.
- I thought you’d never ask!
- Maybe another time?
- 10 years from now, maybe?
- Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?
- Never!
- It better be worth all the work!
- We’ll see.
- Maybe.
- Could you repeat the question?
- For the love of… wait… are you serious?
- Well, only if you know how to cook and clean.
- Awwnnn…thanks but no thanks.
- *starts crying* and sends a… “Yes yes yes!”
- But I have so much life to live and so many things to see and do!
- Yeah… if you’re filthy rich, then damn it, yeah!
- Probably so, but I totally forgot I have another appointment.
Witty Responses to “Will You Marry Me?”
- Yes.
- Who’s crazy to want to marry me?
- Oh, look at that beautiful butterfly!
- Who put you in this?
- What have I done to you?
- I would, but I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to marry two people at the same time.
- Do we follow the “no return, no exchange” rule?
- Let’s just say I agreed with your proposal.
- Can I still change my mind later?
- I’m not a devil, but are you sure you want to sell your soul to me?
- But I am already married to our lord, Jesus.
- May I ask if you have an expiration date?
- Where are the terms and conditions? I’ll have to review them first.
- If I were you, I would also ask me to marry you.
- Is this a prank? Where are the hidden cameras?
- Only if you have a warranty card, I will return it to you if it is defective.
- Is there a free trial?
- Only if you get me the Lord of the Rings ring. After that, I will be invisible and will never appear again.
- May I ask how much money are we talking about here?
- You are hilarious! Hahahahaha!
- You just made my day with that joke!
- Yes father.
- Yes mom.
- Not if you’re not an anime character.
- OK.
- Of course, I would marry me.
- I already answered that question. You do not remember?
- I saw what you did there.
- Happy April Fool’s Day!
- No, I’m too young to die.
- I already have three husbands. Do you want to be the fourth?
- Rewind this please!
- I want to experience this again.
- I might regret that, but – we only live once – let’s go!
- Probably yes, but I will ask my employees to call you to discuss this.
- My intuition tells me that you are worth it.
- Well, if the ring fits, why not?
- Why buy the cow when the milk is already free?
- I just got out of prison and now you want to lock me up with you in this thing called marriage?!
- I’m not an organ donor, but I’d be happy to give you my heart.
- I’ll have to ask my dog first.
sarcastic answers
- Research reveals…. Not marriage!
- You have to do better than that.
- I will never get married!
- You are crazy!
- Marry? Like you? No way.
- Hmmm… may I ask who you are?
- How do you spell ‘NO’?
- How about mind your own business?
- You are getting ideas above your station.
- There is?
- I don’t want to take care of you.
- That ring looks cheap!
- Could you ask me that again 100 years from now?
- Oh, did you think it would be that easy?
- Sorry, but I’m still not that desperate.
- Is this the first in a series of many questions designed to embarrass me?
- That didn’t happen now!
- Do I look like a mental institution to you?
- I’m wearing the ring, am I?
- Holy crap! You are crazy?
- If you want my money, then I don’t have any!
- Not only do I want to marry you, I also want you to have a dislocated shoulder.
- That’s not what I want, and I think there’s a chance I could have something better.
- Why would I do that?
- I will when hell freezes over.
Amazing Answers And Other Embellishments
- Sorry, but I like women.
- And that’s why I’ll let you go.
- Oh are you kidding me?
- I think we’ve reached the end of the line.
- So go make me a sandwich!
- Get on your knees and tell me you love me.
- But I’m only 8 years old.
- You will regret asking me this.
- I’m very tempted.
- Did you tell your parents about this?
- Who is the lucky boy/girl?
- Wait for me?!
- Let me consult my lawyer first.
- Gosh, you bet, partner!
- Stop playing, brother/sister.
- If I were an idiot, I would say ‘no’ to that.
- I’d love to, but I’ll ask my husband first just in case.
- I don’t know you, but that’s okay!
- Okay, but let’s wait until tomorrow.
- I was about to ask your brother/sister to marry me.
- I was about to ask the same thing.
- Did you say bachelor/bachelorette parties?
- Well, we have some legal documents to deal with, because guess what – I’m already married!
- Umm… let’s stay as friends.
- Wait… what? Do you want to marry me? Good luck with that!
- I’m sorry, but I promised my husband/wife that I would never divorce him.
- For how long?