One of the hardest things to do in a relationship is to decide what to do when he walks away from you.
He may have broken up completely or you just feel like things aren’t the way they used to be.
Either way, it’s scary to see that you’re losing control over your boyfriend’s feelings and you start to get scared of losing him forever.
The worst part of this situation is that if you haven’t broken up yet, your emotions and reactions can literally sabotage the relationship you’re trying to save.
And these emotions can get so intense that they end up profoundly affecting your judgment.
It is completely normal to feel fear, weakness, and even anger towards a man who has emotionally withdrawn from you.
The good news is, that if you know how to deal with the distance he’s trying to put you through when he leaves, your behavior will strengthen your relationship in the long run .
If things are going really well between the two of you (yay!), read these items anyway, because this list is also a plan for the next time he decides to walk away from you (because that will happen for sure, and you won’t you will be more afraid because you will know exactly what to do).
Here’s the three-step process to do when you feel like your man is pulling away from you:
What to Do When He Walks Away
1. Take a Break.
Sometimes what to do when he pulls away from you is more a question of what not to do.
When you feel that he is withdrawing (or worse, when you hear that he wants to end it all), it is necessary to stop everything.
Observe his behavior and yours.
Take time to think, and to get in touch with your inner strength.
This way you will be able to get back into your emotional control.
Negative feelings of fear and anger over a man who is pulling away need time to process, preferably away from him.
Enjoy this space.
Stop worrying about what he’s doing.
It doesn’t matter if you think you should confront him, venting all your anger, thinking it will make him come back closer.
Doing nothing is actually a very powerful thing.
Remember that there is no urgency to any interaction with a man (unless he’s on his knees begging for your attention and love).
2. Look for Distractions.
This needs to be repeated: “ there is no urgency whatsoever in any interaction with a man ”.
Slow down and go do something else to distract your mind and stop thinking about him and the situation for a while.
Sometimes, when you make time just for yourself, you can see the perspective.
Don’t run after him, don’t ask him what’s going on, let alone try to get his attention.
I let him have all the distance in the world.
Dive into new things, like a new hobby or volunteer work.
3. Control Your Intense Emotions When He Finally Contacts You.
If you give him space, he will naturally start to get curious and will want to know what you are doing and thinking because he will have time to think about you.
However, when the man returns after having distanced himself—depending on the circumstances—that first contact generates an avalanche of mixed emotions.
You’ll be extremely happy that he’s back and angry that he’s walked away.
Once he gets in touch with you and becomes emotionally present, never, ever unload all of your negative emotions.
This can be very difficult because you want to vent your anger and talk about how ridiculous and unfair he is doing this.
It helps you to think of it this way: if you attack him with all your might when he eventually comes back to you and is vulnerable, you’re punishing him at the very moment he’s finally doing what you want.
Trying to punish him for the things men naturally do will completely destroy the relationship in the long run.
Men pull away for a myriad of reasons—and many of those reasons have nothing to do with you or your relationship with him.
However, if you choose to vent your anger, he will start to think that the problem is with you.
He will find this relationship to be a trap he cannot escape.
Since this is the exact opposite of what you want, you should use sugar, not vinegar, to catch the fly when it comes back.
It’s frustrating to see him acting like he’s doing nothing, but this list will put you in control of the situation when he decides to walk away for whatever reason.
Are you frustrated over a man who is ignoring your calls and texts?
Take out your anger in the comments below, not on him.