Lately, it seems like your boyfriend or husband would rather do anything else than hang out with you.
Whether it’s working late, hanging out with friends, or just playing games on his console, it seems like there are thousands of things that come before you.
Over time, guys can become complacent and unintentionally forget to keep their end of the bargain.
When the time comes, you may be tempted to give him a dose of his own medicine.
And what better way to get his attention than with a controlled dose of jealousy?
In this article, I’ll show you 15 surefire ways to make a man jealous. But before we get into that, we need to understand why jealousy is so powerful (and why you need to be careful when using it).
Why Jealousy Works: The Science Behind Jealousy
Fortunately, a disinterested partner doesn’t always mean the end of a relationship. Complacency can be corrected; all it takes is a little work. And one way to do that is jealousy.
So what is jealousy?
At its core, jealousy is the instinctive feeling or reaction we have when we feel that something that is ours is in danger of being taken away from us.
Jealousy is an intense form of protection because, unlike protection, jealousy can quickly manifest in destructive acts and responses, turning into controlling and selfish behavior.
Jealousy can blind us to real reality, making us believe in a fantastic reality because of the intense emotions involved.
Since jealousy is a deeply personal issue, it is most effective with partners who have personal issues such as low self-esteem and insecurity.
But anyone can be jealous, as long as something they love deeply is in danger of being taken away.
So, is jealousy good for a relationship?
Playing with jealousy is like playing with fire – if done carefully, it can be the perfect way to boost a relationship and give you the boost you need.
If done too aggressively, it can become a source of toxic feelings for the relationship, making it worse rather than saving your relationship.
Jealousy can definitely be used for good in a relationship because it can do the following for your partner:
- Remind him of his worth
- Remind him how lucky he is to have you
- Show him that you’re still attractive and desired, and other men want you.
- Make him understand that you don’t have to be his.
- Remind him how much he wanted you before complacency set in
Making him jealous: 15 ways to make your man want you more
Want to remind him that he was lucky to get you in the first place? Here are fifteen safe ways to make your boyfriend jealous without putting your relationship in jeopardy:
1) Reminisce about your ex
It doesn’t matter if you’re his girl and you know it. Recalling positive memories you had with your ex is one of the easiest ways to make a guy jealous.
Men are very territorial beings, and hearing you talk about a guy you’ve dated before can make him doubt your position in your life.
You don’t need to talk about anything particularly raunchy or intimate. Even just wondering how your ex is doing or talking about that nice date you had is enough to make your blood boil.
2) Hug a friend in front of him
Physical touch is another thing that makes him lose his mind. Even the most harmless of touches – a hug, a playful pat – is enough to drive him crazy with jealousy.
Next time you go out with your friends or meet another couple for lunch, laugh a little louder and let your eyes linger a little longer.
It won’t be long before he asks about your “feelings” for someone else.
3) Touch another man “accidentally”
This is a little sneaky, but it can be very effective. If you’re sitting with your friends and your boyfriend, try to “accidentally” touch another man and laugh at his jokes all the time.
However, don’t be too obvious about it. It might look scary, so be sure to do it in a way that feels natural.
Look, guys are very sensitive when it comes to this. When someone touches their woman, they can’t help but become ultra protective.
In fact, a study published in the Physiology & Behavior Journal shows that a man’s testosterone makes him feel protective about his partner’s safety and well-being.
4) Take time to return calls or text messages
Are you usually the one in the relationship who drops everything just to return text messages or calls?
Spend a few days texting or calling him back. Or better yet, just don’t reply until he sends you another message.
This will make him think about what keeps you busy.
Sooner or later, your man is going to realize that your attention isn’t exclusive to him and that there are other things you could do with your time than spend it with him. That should make him even more grateful for the attention he’s received so far.
5) Go out with friends
Is your man convinced that he’s the one you’d rather spend time with?
Keep him on his toes by reminding him of your very active social circle. Plan a date with your friends and go somewhere fun. As a bonus, send him a picture of you all dressed up and ready to party.
This will remind him that you had a life before him and are still very capable of creating one after him.
6) Talk about your celebrity crush
Celebrities are practically unattainable, but that doesn’t stop boyfriends from being jealous of them.
Hearing the girl talk about how dreamy an actor is or how attractive a model is can make any guy think twice about his own appearance.
Who knows? This could be the little push he needs to start dressing better and taking his formal wear nights more seriously.
7) Be friendly with your friends
Again, guys are extremely territorial, even when it comes to their own pack. The next time he asks where you are and what you’re doing, send him a casual selfie with one of your friends.
Give one of your friends (or better yet, your best friend) a little more attention than necessary.
Sooner or later, you’re going to be bombarded with text messages asking what’s going on. This will make him rethink what you are bringing to the table and will make him less likely to take him for granted.
8) Skip some date nights
One reason he has become complacent is perhaps because you are too available. No matter the time or day, he knows he can count on you to come and have some fun.
Skipping a few date nights and telling him you’re working late or hanging out with some friends should be a serious reminder not to take your time for granted.
If you can, keep this little game going for a few dates until he’s ready to do more than text or call you.
9) Strike a pose with some guys
Social media is one of the most powerful tools in your arsenal. It’s a great way to get your message across without necessarily getting in touch with the recipient.
The next time you go out with a friend, post a selfie of the two of you hanging out together. It doesn’t matter how hot the guy is or how harmless your relationship is.
Just seeing a picture of you with someone else makes him wonder if he’s still in the picture. Bonus points: if the guy you’re dating looks like someone straight out of a catalog.
10) Say someone asked you out
Nothing wrong with a little white lie now and then. Even the most secure and emotionally confident boyfriend will feel a little left out if you bring up someone asking you out.
What’s even more devastating is if you show not-so-subtle hints of liking the attention.
This little trick is guaranteed to make your man roll up his sleeves and step up his game. Maybe the next time he wants to choose your console over you, he’ll remember that little stunt you did.
11) Hanging out with a friend (dude)
Being competitive is in every guy’s DNA. Seeing you go out alone with another guy, even if it’s just one of your closest friends, is an instant trigger of jealousy.
Most guys understand that having a boyfriend isn’t enough to get other men off your scent.
His brain will easily solve the math, and before you know it, he’s trying to fill your schedule so no other guy ends up spending time with you.
12) Hanging out with your friends
There is no way around this. Guys hate it when their girls go out without them.
In the back of their minds, they are constantly thinking that another guy is going to hit on her and she might get drunk enough to cheat.
As far away as reality is, any guy can’t help but think about it.
So if you want to make your guy jealous, put on your beautiful dress, apply your favorite makeup and style your hair.
When your man sees that you are dressed to be impressed, he will immediately be uncomfortable because he knows that other guys will notice you and try their best to get your attention.
You know what this will do, right?
Yes, turn him into a jealous monster, and he won’t be able to relax until his home safe and sound.
It’s amazing how a little effort can change his world, right?
13) Ignore your text messages and calls
Do you usually text your man back right away? Answer your calls in 1 second?
Well, it’s time for a change of tune.
Show your man that you are not available every minute or every hour of the day.
You have your own life and you have things to do.
If you really want to piss him off, post on social media and let him know you’re online.
He’s going to find out that you’re obviously ignoring him. This will make him think twice about his behavior and reflect on how much he really cares about you.
He may even realize that acting from a distance clearly doesn’t work for you.
14) Compliment your best male friend
This is a little cheeky, but if you pay more attention to your best friend or his best friend than to him, he will be jealous.
He’ll be confused why you’re acting this way and why he’s just not enough for you.
But it could be the wake-up call he needs to pull himself together and take care of you like you know he should.
He’ll start comparing himself to your best friend and wondering what you find so attractive about him.
This will make your boyfriend think more about you and what he can bring to the table to make sure you don’t leave him.
15) Say you’re at work late (with a coworker)
He probably thinks it’s okay that you work late and don’t come home for dinner, but what if you tell him you’re working late with a coworker? Hmm. The plot gets complicated.
He won’t be able to stop thinking about what the two of you might be doing.
Is it really only working when it’s late?
After all, we’ve all seen those Hollywood movies where two coworkers are alone in the office at night and, well… we all know what happens next.
Your man might even start to wonder if this co-worker is better in bed than he is. The mind can run very fast sometimes!
There’s no doubt this feeling will consume him, and he won’t be able to relax until he knows you were just working.
How jealousy can be your superpower and your kryptonite
Realizing the effect you have on another person can be a feeling of empowerment.
With jealousy as part of your arsenal, you have a reliable way of pushing his buttons lightly so that he remains pleasant and fulfills his end of the bargain.
But with great power comes great responsibility. Abusing this power will likely backfire and open up a box of worms you’ve never had to deal with until now.
Using jealousy to stoke the fire once in a while can be good for a broken, but healthy and happy relationship; to abuse that power for anything else is just a shortcut to a breakup.
Why do guys get complacent in relationships and how do you know you’re not overreacting?
One of the main reasons you might want to make a man jealous is because he has become complacent in your relationship.
He doesn’t respect you anymore and doesn’t see you in the same way anymore and takes you for granted in ways you’ve never experienced. And one of the main causes of this is usually the end of the honeymoon period.
We all know about the honeymoon period – the period in the relationship where everything seems new and wonderful, but which inevitably comes to an unhappy end, leaving behind a relationship that is significantly less satisfying.
But when you’re in the honeymoon period — or one of those lucky couples who just have a perfect relationship — you never want to believe that the honeymoon period is real, because you never want to think that your relationship might drop a few steps.
The honeymoon period can last for months and, in some cases, years, but for most couples, this period eventually comes to an end.
This is when one or both partners are not only comfortable, but very comfortable. They become complacent.
Complacency can be fatal to a relationship, and men tend to fall into this state of complacency more often than women.
While women experience their fair share of complacency fits, it’s usually the men who get “bored” with the relationship first. This could be due to several reasons, such as:
– They love the “chase” of the relationship and once that happens they feel like the fun is over
– They get used to the honeymoon period and when it’s over, they feel like the relationship isn’t worth it anymore
– They miss the feeling of being alone after being with a partner for a long time and crave their individuality
– They don’t like the reality of establishing a routine with their partner, and instead of trying to reinvigorate it, they tend to look away
Complacency goes hand in hand with apathy; Once we start feeling like our partner is someone who is just a fundamental part of our life rather than someone we have to win and prove ourselves to, we start to feel apathetic about maintaining romantic quality and standards. that our partner expects.
We stop caring what they care about and start turning inward or even looking at other people.
But how do you know that your partner has really become complacent? It could be that you are overdoing it and needing more attention, which could be another sign that the honeymoon period is over.
Here are some everyday signs that indicate your man has become complacent in your relationship:
- Vacations, date nights, and spontaneous encounters are all gone, replaced by boring, mechanical routines that give you no reason to get excited.
- You no longer tell each other everything, both the big events that changed your lives and the little secrets and anxieties of everyday life.
- You feel emotionally and mentally distant from him, as if there are an increasing number of other things going on in your life that have nothing to do with you.
4 Ways to Know Your Man Is Appreciating You
Before using the jealousy techniques above, you need to make sure that your man is really appreciating you.
Jealousy can be a “dirty tactic” that can go wrong in many ways, and potentially damage your relationship if not done carefully, so it should be considered a last resort option.
Therefore, you must be absolutely certain that your man is appreciating you before you employ the dark arts of jealousy.
Here are 4 clear ways to know your man is definitely appreciating you:
1) He is no longer helping you
The most obvious sign your boyfriend is taking for granted is when he is no longer taking responsibility for you.
If he doesn’t…
- Protect you when you need it too
- support you when you need it
- help you with your problems
- Get out of his way to make sure you’re okay.
2) He’s Stopped Appreciating The Things You Do
When we look at other people’s relationships, we tend to only see the big stuff: her amazing journey through Europe, her expensive honeymoon, her beautiful home and kids, and everything else posted on social media.
But true happiness in a relationship is not full of rare, important events.
It’s made up of all the little things; the minimal acts of love and kindness shared between two partners in their daily life.
All the little things you do for each other to show that you appreciate your partner, and it doesn’t have to be during holidays or anniversaries or anniversaries when you show your love, but any day of the week, any time of day.
And he stopped worrying about the things you do.
He doesn’t like the random “I love you, hope you’re having a good day” texts anymore and sometimes even ignores you.
He doesn’t care if you’ve cooked him a good meal after a long day; he just wants to swallow and go back to the computer or phone.
3) He is only affectionate when he wants something physical
It can be hard to tell the difference between your partner being less affectionate or you being more and more attention-seeking (especially since he’ll make you believe he’s the last and not the first).
But an easy way to be sure is to see how your man acts when he wants to be physical with you.
Does he suddenly become what he was? Does he shower you with praise and attention, kiss and touch you in ways he hasn’t done in a while?
If it’s like he’s a different person when he’s lusting after you, then his disinterest in you when he doesn’t want your body becomes even clearer.
4) You dropped off your priority list
You used to be number one in all things in life. When you texted, he replied; when you were sick, he would come with medicine and soup.
He canceled plans with friends for you and changed the schedule around you because he wanted you to realize that he had time and space for you in life; that he would be happy to make you his life.
But now he takes every opportunity to seemingly stay away from you. If he gets a call or email from work, he’ll always say he needs to answer or go to the office.
If his friends want him to leave, he’ll make excuses for you instead of weighing his options further.
You are your second choice, your backup plan, and you never know if plans are going to last until they actually happen.