One study showed: “14 percent of adults feel abandoned because they are in an unhappy relationship.” We take a closer look at some of the signs that you are in an unhappy relationship and give you tips on how to get out of it.
4 signs of an unhappy relationship
The question that often arises is how to recognize the downsides of a partnership. We use two situations to show how a happy partnership can quickly turn into an unhappy one.
A) Every relationship has bad phases.
The return to everyday life
Everything is easy at first. You’ve recently fallen in love, look at the world through rose-colored glasses, and are able to spend every free minute with your partner as a matter of course. But at some point, you notice that the butterflies have left the abdomen. This usually happens faster when you get to the daily grind. Your love is now being put to the test to see if you can handle regulated processes.
Don’t underestimate the power of everyday life, which can quickly become the alarm bells for an unhappy relationship. If spontaneous activities for each other suddenly require a schedule of commitments, frustration sets in, which can also degenerate into stressful relationships.
According to a study, irritated and nervous mood in conversations is one of the top signs that it is about to end in 35% of couples.
difficult life situations
Couples are often overwhelmed by difficult life situations. This encourages one or both partners to become unhappy in the relationship. Family issues like illness, fights, death, or work issues like stress, unemployment, or existential fears can become a challenge. This can create conflict and relationship problems. If you can only bear stress with difficulty, the harmonic balance of a partnership can quickly fall.
B) Unhappy relationship and resignation due to permanent condition
When months turn into years
There can be phases in any relationship where things don’t go so well and you feel lonely. These phases can drag on for months, depending on the situation, when everyone is living in front of them and there is no more exchange.
A study shows that nearly a quarter of couples barely spoke to each other shortly before separation.
A tense work situation can also be cited as an example, which means that you rarely see each other during the week. But this must not become a permanent condition. Because then an unhappy relationship can make you sick. Initial frustration can gradually turn into resignation and, in the end, even depression.
Relationship type: together or separately
The life situation can also mean that you will quickly find yourself in an unhappy relationship. That depends on whether you live together or in separate families. If you have just moved into a new house, you must be careful that everyday life does not become a reason for separation. Cleaning and joint organization must become familiar so that a cozy union can emerge.
Couples who live apart enjoy more freedom and the longing for their partner remains alive for longer, but here too there is a risk of alienation. Long-distance relationships are subjected to a special endurance test, as time is an important factor in addition to spatial distance. The few moments you then enjoy together are loaded with even more expectations. This proximity-distance problem can become a permanent problem.
Unhappy relationship: what to do about it
A) How do you fight for the relationship
Avoid criticism
You don’t have to invent wild actionism to fight everyday life. It’s often the little things that help bring happiness back to your unhappy relationship. Small attention, loving words of gratitude, and honest praise soften negative moods and build trust. Never set expectations too high and avoid making critical comments that turn into unnecessary arguments.
According to one study, couples’ critical behavior was particularly high just before separation.
Above all, behavior, appearance, and attitude came into focus in the unhappy relationship. First, focus on the positive. In this way, you can ensure that you, as a couple, overcome the bad phases and difficult situations in life.
don’t expect too much
If the first signs of an unhappy relationship are already there, don’t expect too much. If you have a hot topic under your fingernails, address your thoughts and feelings immediately and honestly. The sooner your partner knows what your stance is and what worries you, the sooner you’ll avoid spinning your endless loops on the hamster wheel of resignation. Only if your partner also knows where he is with you will he have a chance to react.
B) Unhappy Relationship at the End of the Line: When Should You Break Up?
desperate efforts
A partnership is repeatedly challenged to find common solutions and compromises in case of problems. After all, both partners need to feel comfortable in a partnership. If you notice that your partner is turning into a narcissist and does not respond to your needs or always chooses the solution only unilaterally and in your favor, an imbalance arises.
As a result, one of the partners in the relationship always remains unhappy.
The relationship as a creator of disease
Depression can develop very quickly from resignation, feelings of emotional abandonment, and loneliness in a partnership. Unhappy relationships have the potential to make one partner sick. If you feel that the relationship is in jeopardy and it robs you of all your strength, so that in the end even your health suffers, separation is often a necessary step.
Only then do you have the opportunity to come back to yourself and get your emotions back on track? Your own well-being comes first. Love shouldn’t make people sick, it should catch and support them.
Conclusion: Your own well-being counts in an unhappy relationship
Take your partnership seriously and be on the lookout for the warning signs of occasional arguments and a permanent relationship crisis. If it’s still a stage where the relationship can be saved, then take matters into your own hands so it doesn’t become a permanent state. But if all the signs indicate that you’re in an unhappy relationship that, with the best of intentions, won’t change and even end up morbid, then it’s time to face the truth.
Our recommendation: it’s usually better to be brave and break up than to live in a stressful, everyday relationship. In this case, think about yourself first of all: if you have taken this step and you know what is good for you and what you want, you will quickly find a new partner with whom you can have a happy new start after the breakup.