How to finally forget your ex

Your relationship is over. You have to forget about your ex. But it seems almost impossible, especially right after a breakup – whatever the reasons behind it. In everyday situations, your ex-partner reappears in your mind. When you play sports, you remember: Oh, he loved to run too. In the movies, you see other couples and you would like to get your relationship back.

The separation has opened a hole in your heart, in your everyday life, and in your habits. But don’t worry: you don’t have to wait for time to heal all your wounds. To leave your ex and process the breakup, you can actively work on it yourself.

How do I forget about my ex?

If you want to forget about your ex: leave your previous relationship where it belongs: in the past. Otherwise, you may miss the chance for a new love and a fresh start after the breakup here and now. Of course, thinking about your ex is completely normal. Especially after ending a relationship. These strategies can now help you:

Top tips for getting rid of your ex

1. Break contact

To free yourself from the past and forget about your ex, you need a radical cut. Without it, it doesn’t work at first. The ex-boyfriend shouldn’t get in touch again. Breaking up with your ex also sends a signal to you: I’m the focus now! This includes not only finding them but also removing a contact from mobile and social media. Post-breakup friendship should not be directed at this point.

2. Let your pain out

The need to hide on the couch with chocolate ice cream and sweatpants is great. Do it! Just invite good friends to do this. Talk about your pain, berate yourself, cry – even if the other is just listening. Talking about everything once or several times helps a lot when it comes to forgetting about your ex and dealing with your headache.

Extra perk: It‘s nice to know that someone other than your partner is by your side now and by your side. You’re single again – but that doesn’t mean you’re alone.

3. Not everything that shines in memory is gold

An important tip to help you forget about your ex is to realize that not everything you lived together was good. Because in the early stages of infatuation, your memories of him appear much rosier and better than what actually happened in the real world. 

If you don’t actively take countermeasures, it can get in the way in the future. Did your ex know that you prefer salty popcorn to sweet? Wrong, because sometimes he would still buy you the wrong package. Was your last vacation together in a dream made of pink cotton candy? Hardly, because on the beach he broke up an argument out of nowhere.

4. List all your bad habits

This strategy is definitely one of the classics, for not getting jealous of your ex and getting him out of your head: Make a list of all the downsides and annoying habits and little things your ex does regularly – or just sometimes – what drove you crazy. When you look at everything that has ever bothered you, it creates emotional distance — and it’s much easier for you to let your ex-partner go.

5. Focus on you!

Save the old relationship? That’s out of the question. It’s checked, and now you’re the focus again. To forget about your ex, it is important not to focus on him anymore, but on yourself. What would you like to do now? What would help you feel better now? What needs do you have, what haven’t you done in a long time – maybe because of your ex-partner? What would you like to experience?

Extra tip:   use your newfound freedom – and recognize it as such.

6. Take your time to get over your ex

Accepting that you can’t get your ex back and going single again takes time. How long cannot be answered in a general way? It depends on you. Not only do you have to let go of your ex, but you also have to process the grief and learn to feel good again. Take the time you need to come back psychologically. Take care of yourself, log into the gym, travel, and plan a wellness vacation.

The advantages:   At some point, you will be able to say with full conviction: “I am single and happy!” And you will feel authentic. Thus, you are self-confident and firm in any life situation, even if your ex suddenly has a new girlfriend.

Conclusion: forgot your ex? It works with the right strategy!

As you can see, crawling around and waiting for the pain to subside on its own works – but it doesn’t take you any further in your personal development and the process of letting go of love. If you follow the tips above, you will extract a lot of value for yourself in the process. And most importantly, you not only learn how to forget about your ex, but also how to love yourself. And you can always count on that love.