Want to know if you should break up with your boyfriend?
Here are 18 reasons to help you make your decision.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times: Love sucks.
It’s all warm and fuzzy at first, and sometimes that warm fuzzy feeling lasts forever between two people.
There are other times, though, when your man does something so heinous that those affectionate, confused feelings are replaced by thoughts of moving on.
It happens.
There are times, though, when we women get scared in a relationship and want to end a good thing because we’re scared.
Maybe we’re afraid that we’ll fall in love and he’ll break our heart, or maybe we’re afraid that we don’t deserve someone so good to us.
Let me soothe you with two things.
First, you deserve someone who is good for you, no matter what your background.
Second, part of falling in love is facing the fear of rejection from the one you gave your heart to.
Yes, it’s scary, but there’s no guarantee it will end badly.
There are some relationships that end badly, however, and some reasons that really deserve a breakup.
If your boyfriend has done any of the following things on this list, then you are within your rights to dump him and look for someone better.
Here’s the list, ladies.
1. He Lied To You
I’ve never met a person (man or woman) who didn’t tell his lover a little lie every now and then.
Maybe he said he was at the gym but he was actually having beer and pizza with his friends, or maybe he skipped work to play football but said he had a hell of a day at the office.
That’s not much.
While they are certainly lies worthy of making you sleep on the couch, they are not harmful.
A lie that hurts you in some way is an obstacle.
If he lies about who he was with last night, lies when you know he took your money, likes anything that could be physically or mentally harmful or that could really ruin your trust in him, then get the hell out of him.
After a man tells this kind of lie, he is likely to lie again.
2. He Betrayed You
If your man has cheated on you, and you have evidence and not just a botched theory, then you should definitely get rid of him and find a faithful guy.
Well, I can’t judge because we’re only human, and sometimes you can really get over an episode of cheating.
However, if he’s a chronic traitor with no intention of changing, you’d be doing yourself a huge favor by finding someone better.
3. He Never Supports
Any man who doesn’t support your dreams and ideas is not worth having around.
I don’t care if you tell him you’re thinking about going to space camp, that man better back you one hundred percent!
Because?
Loving couples support each other.
Loving couples encourage each other.
Don’t be with a man who won’t encourage you to be yourself.
4. There’s Too Much Drama
Does he get into bar fights every weekend?
Does he have three other friends or sisters who call him day and night or who knock on his door?
Does the drama haunt you?
Nobody has time for that kind of thing.
You don’t need that in your life – let that man and his drama go!
5. He Likes To Fight
If you’re with a man who instigates a fight or purposely provokes you to get you all worked up, then you’re going to have a lot of headaches.
In fact, there are some men who love arguments and revel in anger.
You can’t be with that kind of man and be happy.
6. He’s Always Depressed
Everyone gets discouraged from time to time.
I’m known for seasonal depression and I get very depressed during my monthly cycle, but I bounce back and get back to normal (which is what most people do).
However, if you are with a man who is chronically depressed and refuses to seek help, then you have to leave the relationship.
His depression will eventually drag you down with him, but more importantly, by staying with him, you encourage him to keep going without seeking help.
It’s a tough decision, but you can’t be with someone who’s unhappy forever.
7. He’s Lazy
Men who are inherently lazy will never change, and you can’t expect them to.
You may wish for him to change, you may yell and yell and fight with him about your lack of a job and lack of responsibility in the house, but he won’t.
Just get rid of his lazy ass right now, so you only have to worry about yourself.
8. He Is Verbally/Emotionally Abusive
Many women don’t see the signs of verbal and emotional abuse, so if your friends are worried about you or the way he talks to you, you need to take notes and listen to them.
This guy won’t change and he won’t get better.
In fact, it will get much worse.
Let it.
9. He Is Physically Abusive
LEAVE IT AND DON’T LOOK BACK!
DO IT NOW!
10. He Uses You for Money
A real man earns his own money; he doesn’t take the sponge away from you.
This guy is not only lazy but also a user.
Get rid of him.
11. You Have Different Goals For The Future
A valid reason to break up with someone is that you have different ideas about the future.
If he wants two kids and a house in the suburbs, but you want to travel the world like a nomad, then he probably won’t be compatible in the future.
There are some things that cannot be compromised.
12. You Have Different Ideas About Commitment
This has been a particularly painful thorn in my side for the last few guys I’ve dated.
Men who want to date you but don’t want to get close are not worth dating.
Men who want to be friends with benefits will never officially date you, and men who want an “open relationship” are classic cheaters who don’t want the guilt of “cheating” on you.
Honestly, I sometimes wonder if there are any truly monogamous men left in the world.
Anyway, any of the above ideas about relationships are just boys who don’t want to grow up; throw it away (preferably before sleeping with it).
13. He’s An Unpleasant Person
You can’t change a man’s personality, and if he’s the kind of man who’s rude to people, doesn’t tip waitresses, and hits on girls in front of you, he’s a nasty person and he won’t change and you must not want to be with him.
While he may be nice to you now, that level of meanness will eventually become part of YOUR relationship and you will hate him for it.
Do yourself a favor and break up with him now, before your relationship gets nasty.
14. He’s A Narcissist
You can’t want to date a man in love with himself, can you?
Let me tell you something I learned recently.
If a man thinks of himself so well that he’d rather go shopping for HIM clothes than go to the event YOU’ve planned together weeks in advance, he’s never going to love you as much as he loves his mirror.
One of my exes is the most narcissistic person I’ve ever met and even now I get a little sick when I remember he broke up with me over email saying he “likes younger women”.
As if!
I still can’t believe I let him see me naked.
Get rid of him, honey, before the urge comes to hit him with your car!
15. He Has Peter Pan Syndrome
I have absolutely nothing against a guy who plays video games or collects action figures.
After all, men will always love their toys!
However, if your man makes you his mother instead of his girlfriend, then he definitely has Peter Pan syndrome.
There are some men who can’t do anything on their own.
They have to have your approval and opinion about every little thing.
This is annoying but generally harmless.
However, there are some men who are eternal frat boys who get completely drunk every weekend, depend on you to help them financially, and cannot hold down a steady job.
These are the Peter Pan guys.
They are also generally lacking in the commitment department because commitment means being an adult.
You want a man, not a boy.
Get rid of him.
16. You Feel Like You’re “Settling In”
Here’s a tricky one.
If you’re with a man who mistreats, hurts, uses, or degrades you, then yes, you’re settling in and you need to let him go.
If you are with a man who is good for you, not bad, but not good, then you are also settling for less than you deserve.
Love should never be about “settling down”.
Love must be fireworks and light; must be excellent!
When the sparks fade, there’s a level of comfort and care, but you should never feel like there’s anything better out there.
If you feel this way, you are harming yourself and also the man you are in this relationship with.
On the other hand, don’t confuse cold feet with feelings of accommodation; you really need to look inside yourself to make sure you’re making the right choice in this case.
17. You’re Being Smothered
If you feel like you can’t breathe in a relationship then you should definitely get out of it.
There’s no reason for you to be with a man who should know your every move, be with you night and day, constantly text you when you’re with the girls, or insist on being a part of everything in your life.
While it looks good on the surface, in reality, people need space to breathe.
You are in a relationship; you are not welded at the hip with your partner.
Don’t stay if you feel like you’re being smothered.
18. It’s Not Love
There’s never a reason to stay in a relationship if you know in your heart that it’s not love.
The love of two people creates a relationship, not just the love of one.
So if one of you isn’t in love, it’s time to leave.
Now tell us: are you in a relationship that you need to get out of?