Why do people cling to what is not meant for them
I think we hold onto things that aren’t meant for us, because at some level we know they’re not really meant for us. We are always looking for the love we don’t have. And always try to prove things that are not self-evident.
We know that when we stop thinking and talking and going through the details over and over again, it will truly be over. When all that exists is an idea, hanging on is the only way to keep it.
Letting go has nothing to do with giving someone permission to leave our life, or to declare that they don’t love us anymore, or to leave for good, and anything having to do with their acceptance.
I don’t know fate.
But I know the things that belong to us don’t force us to keep them mentally and emotionally to stay. That the best things are never forced, never created by an ultimatum, never leave us wondering for months or even years at a time.
I know you can’t prove how much you love by the pain you feel for the loss. That you don’t prove your character by your ability to convince others that you are doing the right thing.
And I know it’s not love that hurts you.
It’s the attachment to the idea of what it’s meant to be and how long it’s supposed to be. I know we will never be able to find true love without learning to detach ourselves from what it should be. And that we will never find true happiness until we do the same. But I am aware that nothing lasts here and the idea that this is happening is an illusion. We end up losing everything, everything we have, and what we have.
So it’s not what we lose, but what we initially had.
We are not supposed to achieve goals like on a CV, we are supposed to review them and let them go through us.
Some loves teach us what they should teach us in a month. Others last a lifetime. There is not one more important than the other.
The things that are intended for us are those that force us to stop looking for an outside light, but to start becoming it. The things that are meant for us are trying, joyful, beautiful, and atrocious. These are the things we don’t think about.
We don’t have to hold on tight to things for them to happen.