Maybe you are wondering if your partner is the right person, in which case ask yourself these two questions about your relationship, and you will get some clues.
How do you know if this is the right person? What if I’m on the wrong track? What if there were really two or three or …
As humans, we always tend to complicate things. Many animals mate for life without spending their nights trying to figure out if their partner is the right one.
For example, wolves, coyotes, owls, beavers, eagles, swans, cranes, pigeons, hawks, ospreys, geese, and some monkeys don’t spend their time wondering if they have made the right choice or if something better awaits them elsewhere.
They just know it.
I have read several articles and books that indicate that if I answer “No” to any of their questions, my relationship might not be right for me. I’ve read books that ask hundreds of questions and no matter what you answer, you end up wondering why you fell in love with this person.
We confide in friends, therapists, and experts. We take online quizzes and look for “signs” and we always ask questions.
Does he make you feel…?
Does he have…?
Does he give you …?
Can he read your mind?
Do you speak the same language in love?
Here are 2 questions to ask yourself if you plan to spend the rest of your life with someone:
1. Do I like this person?
And no, is this person attractive? No, do I like this person? No, are we compatible? Would I give him half of my salary, the last bite, my car, or even a kidney? Is this kind of love?
If the answer is yes then you have already come halfway. True love is the motivation for growth, understanding, and compassion. True love inspires us to become better people who can overcome small difficulties and fleeting emotions. True love prompts us to do what it takes to care for our loved ones.
2. Is my life and that of my partner better because of our relationship?
Imagine your life without your partner and ask yourself: How could I live without this person? How would I feel? Would I feel fulfilled? Would I feel empty? Would I sleep well or would I stay awake all night?
Who can I confide in? Who should I spend my time with? Who would be my pillar? Is my love my best friend? What would I do every day if this person disappeared from my life?
There might be a thousand questions and we need to be aware of our answers, but we shouldn’t go into too much detail. We have to keep it simple. We need to put aside all secondary emotions like envy, put aside fear and attachment, and know that no matter what, we will survive. With a pure, courageous, and open heart, we must ask ourselves this simple question: how would my life be without this person whom I call my love?
We tend to complicate things with mountains of questions that can create doubt and confusion. Sometimes the answer is obvious if we simplify it. If we can take a step back and answer these two questions honestly and without fear, I think the answer to whether we are with the right person, or not, will be obvious.
If we truly and sincerely surrender to our partner and recognize that our life is better with them, with a little care and a lot of commitment, everything else will fall into place.