Relationships What is true love: the characteristics and the science Posted onAugust 12, 2021AuthorAdam The question of love has intrigued us all for centuries. How do you explain love? Or the reason that we love or the way that we love? All these questions have passed through all of our minds at some point in our lives because love is a feeling that we have all experienced. Whether it is the platonic love between a mother and a child or the romantic love between two people, the emotion is experienced by all. The science behind love is complicated and simple at the same time. While we can all think and symbolize love with the heart, it is in fact a chemical reaction that takes place in our brain and causes us to act as we do when we are in love. Many scientists in recent times have categorized romantic love to include three main components which are lust, attraction, and attachment. Scientists have further distinguished between these categories based on the hormones released during these three feelings. Lust Lust has to do with the physical attraction and physical desires that are innate in every human being. It is the desire of humans to procreate and reproduce and something that cannot be separated from human nature. In lust, hormones are stimulated by the brain, increasing libido and the desire to procreate. Estrogen and testosterone are also known as female and male hormones and cause desire or lust. Attraction The attraction is similar but different at the same time. In the case of attraction, the brain pathways that control reward behavior are activated. Attraction can exist both with and without lust. Dopamine and norepinephrine make us feel good about ourselves and make us feel euphoric, dizzy, and energetic; all things are attractive. Attachment Attachment is best explained by the feelings we feel for our family and is especially prevalent in long-term relationships. It is the bond that two people create during physical intercourse, breastfeeding, childbirth, etc. It includes the bond between spouses, as well as between parents and children. Oxytocin and vasopressin, known as the cuddle hormone, are produced and make us feel warm and comfortable with our loved ones. The meaning, characteristics, and signs of true love Many may argue that true love does not exist and that love is, in fact, just love. However, the best way to explain true love is love that has lust, attraction, and attachment that endures as in most happy marriages. Here are some characteristics to help you identify signs of true love: 1. True love is instinctive and easy If love is effortless in a relationship and attraction comes naturally, it is definitely a sign of true love. Not having to try too hard to spice things up is a good sign of true love. 2. True love is selfless and liberating True love doesn’t come with expectations. It is free and liberating and so it is. There is no acceptability involved and it is a natural bond. 3. True love is stronger than words True love is action and not just feeling. If you really love someone, you will do everything in your power to make them happy. 4. True love is mutual respect True love is respecting your partner and accepting them for who they are. 5. True love is trust Trusting your partner also comes naturally in true love. You are sure that you are safe with your partner and that he or she will never hurt you or let anyone else hurt you. Is true love really blind? Discover the science behind Being blind or blinded by something is an uncomfortable feeling that you have to accept. And when it comes to love, it can be even more perplexing for people to accept or digest the fact that love is blinding them. The question is how does love blind you? 1. Love is blind, pure, and vulnerable When you are in love, you are committed to a person who you think you know well and that you know all aspects of his personality and his life. It is in love that you let your guard down in front of another person and there is total transparency in that relationship. This transparency is something that is required when you are in love and therefore cannot be escaped. It is also something that makes us vulnerable to that other person and makes us dependent on them. It is important that when you are in love with your partner and show your vulnerable and raw true self, that your partner is also on the same level of excitement and attachment. If one person is more involved than the other in a love relationship, this makes the most committed couple blind in some way. The most committed couple will think less critically about their partner and may trust her more and the most committed couple will likely overlook the flaws and failures of their lovers, blinding them in love. 2. Love is blind and sees perfection Another way that love can blind you is through time. True love has the power to create an illusion of perfection in your partner. All of this is also proven by science. According to a research study carried out by the British Broadcasting Company (BBC), our brain reacts differently towards our partner when we have been in love for a long time, “once we get close to a person, the brain decides the need to evaluate their character and personality It is reduced.” This makes it easier for us to overlook the shortcomings of our partners and forgo their shortcomings. We believe that our partner is perfect in the true sense of the word. We stop noticing his physical flaws and also the character flaws. In other words, we are blinded by our love for our partner. 3. Platonic and romantic love overlap In another study carried out by the University College London by the department of neuroscience, a very interesting conclusion was reached. In this study, romantic love was compared to a mother’s platonic love for her child. The research had some fascinating findings that showed that the love felt for a partner and a child has many coincidences and similarities in terms of chemical reactions in the brain. The study showed that a woman, scientifically speaking, feels the same for her husband as she does for her child in the world of the brain. This shows that all loves are equal and that the attachment aspect of love is common in platonic and romantic love. Therefore, the hug hormone, like dopamine, is the universal hormone in all loves. These are also the hormones that strengthen our bonds with our loving partner, making us somewhat blind in a relationship. 4. Love is blind to heartbroken people People whose hearts have been broken are more likely to attest to the feeling of blindness in love. In broken hearts, a person’s trust is broken and their ability to love again is questioned. This is mainly because when they are in love, their social judgment of their partner is one-sided and flawed. They stop noticing things that they would otherwise notice in a new relationship or other social interactions. The things that make them distrust others are no longer visible or obvious to them. Making them blind in love. Summary In short, love is a complicated but simple feeling that everyone can understand, but cannot be fully explained at the same time. True love is a concept in which love exists and then lasts longer than any feeling. The feeling of love is not necessarily the same, it evolves and changes over time. While newly in love people may experience all three aspects of love, namely lust, attraction, and attachment, these feelings will increase, decrease, and change in intensity over time. While initially, lust can be important in a relationship, in later years attachment is what keeps love intact and going. Either way, love, as beautiful as it is, makes you vulnerable and some may say that it blinds you … but maybe that’s exactly what we need to find an escape from all the chaos around us … the sense of security that it makes. being vulnerable easy and the illusion of perfection that we don’t seem to find in the flawed world around us. So don’t be scared by falling in love! Finding true love is difficult, but it is worth it. TweetSharePin11Share11 Shares