The moment you accept less, less is exactly what you will end up receiving.
Which came first: the chicken or the egg?
You might be wondering what this question has to do with men trying harder to date, but stay with me for a second.
As you may have noticed, we are slowly but surely turning the culture back into the abyss of “this is how things are now” when it comes to dating.
Whether we like it or not, or agree with it, there is a traditional dating model that has remained intact, regardless of the infinite other changes that have taken place over the decades: the man pursues and the woman is pursued.
Here’s Something Men Never Admit But It’s The Truth: It Undoubtedly Gives The “Power” To The Woman.
I don’t like to use the word “power” when it comes to relationships, because it implies that someone is in control of someone else, which should never be the case.
But in this context, it shows who is making the final decision when it comes to accepting or denying someone’s advances.
A man asks a woman out, he doesn’t send her.
That means the choice is hers.
In the wild, primates must work to prove they are the best to win the female’s acceptance.
Whether mating or hunting for food, the concept is the same – the amount of effort required is proportionate to the amount of a challenge it is to achieve your goal.
That’s why male lions fight each other to lead the pack.
That’s why the colorful birds display their vibrant feathers to get the female’s attention.
In fact, in many bird species, males are more colorful than females.
Why?
Because, over millions of years of evolution, the brightest males get more attention from females and pass those genetics on to the next generation, whereas duller varieties don’t have the opportunity to mate.
It’s simple, really.
But humans are moving in the opposite direction – whether a man’s goal is to get a date with a woman or to build a relationship with her after a few dates have already taken place, we’re seeing a decline in society in how much effort he should actually put in. .
Why?
Because women are accepting less.
And therefore men are trying less.
And if a woman is “too hard to get,” men are being trained to think that there will be another woman who doesn’t take as much effort because, well, there is.
So, men started doing less because women started accepting less?
Or did women start to accept less because they had no other choice?
Which came first: the chicken or the egg?
When we accept or surrender to “changing times” and new dating “patterns”, we immediately lower the bar dramatically.
We mentally give in and force ourselves to be content, even if it feels wrong, because is it possible to find something better?
Yes.
The point here is not to start making men fight over you or being the most ornate to get their attention, because the fact is, good men only pursue a woman if they feel valued in return.
The point is, it is possible to raise your standards and find men who will give more and will be happy to give more.
It’s possible when you stand up and refuse to accept anything less than a man’s best effort.
He just texts you, but would you rather he call you?
So say something about it.
But keep a positive, playful, and fun attitude.
Tell him you love the sound of his voice and want to hear more.
Don’t make him feel bad or guilty; he probably hasn’t found a woman that demands more effort from him, so he doesn’t know what he needs to do differently.
I’m not saying accept the fact that guys are clueless about dating, but understand that if you take a stand (and you should) on what you would accept, it will likely be a new experience for him, and he may need some input from you…
But one thing is for sure: if he’s the right kind of man and he’s really interested in you, he’ll make the effort necessary to reach the level you’ve set.
If he doesn’t catch up, let him go.
The moment you accept less, less is exactly what you will end up getting.
That’s why you should always raise your standards.
The right man will continue to strive for you, long after he is already committed to you.
He will understand that effort is not only necessary to get his attention, but also to keep it.
Oh, and it goes both ways.