If you’re obsessed with your newest crush, or you’re anxious about your recent breakup and don’t know how to stop thinking about someone, this article is for you!
“I can’t stop thinking about him!” – It’s not easy to have a crush on a guy…
Have you ever been in a situation where you can’t stop thinking about him?
You wake up in the morning, and there it is – in your mind, it’s the first thing you think of.
You think of him on the way to work or school…you think of him every time you see something that reminds you of him… Infatuation seems to last 24 hours a day.
It doesn’t matter if you are together or not.
In fact, it would be fantastic if you were, but being separated from him is driving you crazy.
You might not even know much news about this guy.
Which makes it all that much crazier in your head.
You can be any age, you can be anywhere in your life, and a guy can just shake up your emotions and feelings as you’ve never experienced before.
I know couples who both have this uncontrollable passion going on – and their relationship is great!
So what happens to you?
Why can’t you stop thinking about him?
And what does it take to get your life back and stabilize your emotions?
Your first step should be to ask yourself what you find so attractive about this guy.
Why is he so in your thoughts?
Is it a chemistry thing?
Or is it something else?
The best thing you can do is pull out your pencil and your journal and find out what you find so irresistible about it.
The second thing to do is look at yourself and how you view your status next to this guy.
If you think for a moment that he’s better than you, or you don’t think you’re worthy of him at all – try again.
Keep things in perspective when evaluating your situation.
You probably feel inferior in some ways and even intimidated… but don’t feel that way.
It’s fun to have your head in the clouds but make sure some part of you is still on the ground…
As the saying goes, it doesn’t matter how gorgeous and fantastic you think he is – someone has already gotten sick and tired of him.
Keep it in perspective.
But as it happens, there’s a reason this guy is on your mind so much.
It all boils down to some physical and psychological sciences.
Let’s dig into the 3 reasons why you can’t stop thinking about him…
He’s On Your Mind And In Your Thoughts – Reason 1: Your Brain Has Been Reprogrammed
There’s a part of your brain called the ‘reticular activating system’.
(SAR, for short).
It’s a little bundle of nerves that’s basically your brain’s traffic cop.
Have you ever bought a car and suddenly saw that car everywhere?
It could be shoes or a bag instead of the car, but the effect is the same.
What happened?
Your brain has been reprogrammed – your RAS, basically.
You told your mind what was important to you and now you are pointing it out in your environment.
Your SAR is also connected to a phenomenon called Baader-meinhof syndrome – also called a “frequency illusion”.
Baader-meinhof is the phenomenon where some obscure information occurs – usually an unfamiliar word or name – and then soon encounters the same subject again, often repeatedly.
This is your brain on that loud love…it might even feel like a coincidence – or even some kind of cosmic signal.
But you know what?
Is not.
It’s just your brain-bending your reality.
Again.
It happens more than we think, and you need to be careful.
And that’s one of the big reasons a guy clings to his thoughts like a catchy ’80s song. So be careful not to fall into the traps of the mind…
Why can’t I stop thinking about him? – Reason 2: Your Hormones Are On Fire…!
Well, not literally.
But your brain is dumping one “chemical” after another into your system, and it’s making you more nervous.
Here is a short list of the chemicals in action:
- Adrenaline
- dopamine
- Serotonin
- oxytocin
- vasopressin
You have a virtual cocktail of hormones in your brain when you fall in love like this, and it creates a new reality where you can’t stop thinking about the other person and the memories you’ve had with them.
These love glasses will take care of you if you’re not careful…
Why can’t I get him out of my head? – Reason 3: Suppression Worse…
So now you’re probably wondering how you got so obsessed with this guy, right?
Well, for you to understand how it works, let’s do a quick experiment:
For the next 5 seconds, close your eyes and don’t think about a purple unicorn…don’t think about it, and don’t let the image in your mind.
Okay, now, if you’re like most people, you haven’t made it.
You saw that purple unicorn whether you like it or not.
Trying to suppress a thought only makes things worse.
(people with OCD have a little trouble with this test) Telling yourself to stop thinking about him will only reinforce the fact that you keep thinking about him!
It’s enough to drive you crazy, isn’t it?
Trying to suppress such thoughts can even lead to this person appearing in your dreams.
It’s called the rebound effect.
The key to overcoming this – if it’s something you want to do – is to redirect your thinking, not try to stop it.
Instead of giving in and ruminating about it endlessly, you need to direct those thoughts to something else – something less brilliant and romantic.
For example, focus on the natural emotional evolution you go through with your relationships.
Passion always leads to what?
Eventually love.
After what?
A warm and comfortable place. Usually.
And then?
Reality!
There is no way to fight…
Reality sets in and you realize that no matter what you thought, there is a long relationship that you need to work on to get over it.
And his flaws will always show up, eventually, which is a bit of a pain in the ass for you and a blessed relief.
If you lived your life in love 24/7, you would go crazy.
So keep your feet on the ground – and stay realistic.
Also don’t think about the future!
No wedding fantasies or happily ever afters.
Stay out of that zone for your own good.
Much better to be grounded in reality.
Your neural circuits – your RAS and your subconscious mind – will be primed to think about your love interest, simply by being awash in these love chemicals.
So always remember that your mind is working to reinforce this love interest in your thoughts.
And every time you think about him, you’ll make this guy your overwhelming focus.
The cycle will continue on its own.
And finally, you must ask yourself – why don’t you just do it?
Why not ask him out and let things go?
Okay – I’ll tell you what to do next to make things happen in the best way for your feelings and emotions.
Step 1) First, Discover Where You Are Feeling “Empty” In Your Life Right Now.
This is where you feel dissatisfied and you are also very likely to have a crush on this guy.
If it’s just a hole in your heart, find out if he’s really a great match for you or just a case of passionate chemistry.
Be careful not to get lost in your head – not all mental pleasures are healthy…
Step 2) Be Careful Not to Start Appreciating Him Too Soon.
He’s just a guy, and if you start chasing him in your mind before you even get a date, you’re in the worst position to make him fall in love with you.
Keep an eye out for red flags and other behavioral signs that suggest he might not be the best fit for you.
(Some of these signs include: treating a waiter horribly, freaking out over the littlest things, and so on).
Step 3) Go Out There And Meet Other Guys.
The last thing you want to do is make yourself completely vulnerable to this guy, only to be crushed if he doesn’t return his interest in you.
Make sure you have your own social and romantic calendar balanced with other possibilities.
There are many reasons for this.
You have to get out of this spell he’s put you in, eventually.
So, it’s either give up on him (don’t give up, unless you think he’s not a good person), chase him (and he doesn’t know, that’s an option) or get on his radar fast.
It’s hard to see straight into the heat of the moment… Obviously, if you want a short and simple formula for true love, here it is:
- Meet A Complete Stranger…
- Reveal Intimate Details About Their Lives For Half An Hour…
- Then look deeply into each other’s eyes without speaking for four minutes…
Am I pushing the bar?
No…
New York University psychologist Professor Arthur Aron actually experimented with this in the laboratory.
And you know what?
It worked so well that – after 34 minutes of this experiment – several participants started dating – and a couple got married.
It might work for you – but do you know how to do it the right way?
- First of all, don’t meet a stranger – you don’t want to end up married to a weirdo.
- Second, you need to know what to reveal to him who is “intimate”.
And third – you need to know how to get him to open up and reveal his intimate details…
The rest will come easily…
How Do You Stop Thinking About Your Ex After A Breaking Up?
It’s painfully hard to force yourself to stop thinking about someone when you know it just doesn’t work out.
If only we could turn off our brains, it would make separations so much easier!
Unfortunately, we can’t just push a button, but there are a number of practical things we can do to train our brains not to associate the emotional state of missing someone with the person’s absence from our lives.
You may be wondering:
- Why did he break up with me?
- Will I be single forever?
- What did I do wrong?
- Can I win it back?
And so on…
The best way to get over someone fast is to eliminate all questions about your relationship that just ended.
You’ll need to find out why the relationship ended to prevent these questions from hurting you (so you can stop thinking about him) and also make sure there’s no chance of reconciliation so you can actually move on.
Getting the closing (period) is the only way to achieve this.
Learn to connect with it – keep reading…
The following tips you can use to stop missing someone and realize what’s wrong at the same time.
Make A Decision.
What do you really want?
Do you want to get over him or do you just want to stop obsessing over him?
Sometimes all you need is a little clarity to move forward.
Accept It.
Don’t ignore or avoid thinking about your breakup.
Instead, accept the fact that the breakup happened.
It’s okay to spend a day or two grieving alone.
When you feel like you’re overwhelmed with thoughts, it’s time for you to let go and move on.
Stop Pretending.
Don’t pretend you don’t miss him.
Don’t try to forget he ever existed.
Instead, you need to focus on ways to avoid being harmed by it.
Go ahead.
The best way to stop thinking about someone is to find someone to think about.
And no, that doesn’t mean you need a rebound relationship; think of other men you might love.
This will do wonders for your ego and self-esteem.
Don’t be a stalker.
It’s easy to hope for a date that has a quick chat and it all works out.
Instead, give up planning ways to “accidentally bump into him” and accept the fact that you are trying to stop thinking about him.
What Was He About That Bothered You?
It’s easy to overlook his flaws when you’re in love, but it’s time to knock him off his pedestal.
Once you realize he’s not as perfect as you thought, it would be much easier to avoid falling in love with him.
Out Of The House Already.
It’s all too easy to throw a pity party (lay on the couch to watch the plot with a bucket of ice cream on your chest), get depressed, and suffer from low self-esteem, especially when you feel like he’s stepped on you.
Laughing is the best medicine.
It’s time to have fun.
No Trolling.
It’s time to delete and block!
Social media has made being a troll much easier.
While it might seem like social media is a boon; this is the furthest thing from the truth.
You will never be able to move on unless you stop having anxiety about your ex’s life.
Have a little self-respect.
You loved him and he walked all over you and treated you like nothing.
He didn’t respect you and he doesn’t care about you.
Do you respect yourself?
Find A Hobby.
Learn or do something that always gets you excited, whether it be playing a sport or taking a dance class.
This will fill your mind with new, happy thoughts that will wash away all traces of the person you are trying to get over.
Self-love.
Women are incredibly hard on themselves.
Please don’t try to find fault with yourself to find a reason for his behavior.
Sometimes guys are toxic.
There’s nothing wrong with you, except maybe you don’t love yourself enough.
It’s Vacation Time.
Do you know that vacation you’ve always wanted to take?
Sometimes the best thing is a change of scenery.
A fabulous vacation with her girlfriends to clear her mind and focus on new things is exactly what dr.
ordered.
You will come back feeling much better, more at peace, and with a clearer mind.
He, who???
It’s time to stop gossiping and complaining about him.
Count Until It Works.
As hopeless as your life may seem right now, you need to get through these feelings before they consume your entire mind.
Go out and meet new people!
Pretend you’re having fun and when you least realize it, you won’t have to pretend anymore.
Don’t Facilitate.
Don’t let him know how much he hurt you.
Always remember this, the clingy girl who is having a hard time moving on is the weak person in the relationship.
And the weaker and clingier you act, the easier it will be for him to get over you.
Do you really want to make it easy for him?
Remember these tips on ‘how to stop thinking about someone fast’.
They will help you realize that you need to move on.
As hard as it is to face it, he doesn’t care about you anymore.
And you definitely have what it takes to move forward, as long as you believe in yourself.
You can take control of your relationship and where it is going.
If you want to know what creates an unbreakable connection with the man you want, enter your email below.